Forma caelesti
by Assilem
Summary: Remus Lupin looked upon this woman with first amusement, then somewhere, somehow, he fell in love. This is their story. Remus Lupin/Nymphadora Tonks M for later Chapters.
1. Chapter 1

_Rapt with the rage of mine own ravish'd thought,_

_Through contemplation of those goodly sights,_

_And glorious images in heaven wrought,_

_Whose wondrous beauty, breathing sweet delights_

_Do kindle love in high-conceited sprights;_

_I fain to tell the things that I behold,_

_But feel my wits to fail, and tongue to fold._

He always hated the colour white. It was dull, unappealing, and showed the smallest imperfection. It was also the colour of the moon-his enemy until death.

He much preferred colours that hid imperfections, covered the scars that the world had left. There was something comforting about covering up imperfections. As he stared at the walls that surrounded him, in their white paint, with chips, discolourations, and stains, he knew that those portraits that covered the walls, were hung with a purpose. To cover the white walls.

Dumbledore had called the Order to meet him tomorrow morning, he had arrived at Number 12 Grummauld Place earlier that evening-greeting Sirius with a warm smile, and a hug. They had sat in the kitchen for a few hours, talking, trying to figure out why they were called, and who would be joining them come morning. Remus had his suspicious, as had Sirius, and they both seemed to be carefully organized ideas. What neither of them knew was who would be arriving. They were given orders-Remus would wait on the street outside, and collect people, bringing them inside.

His eyes felt like drooping, the comfort of the old bed was trying to make him sucome to his exhaustion. he could hear Sirius snore from the room opposite, knowing that there was no use fighting. Remus closed his eyes letting sleep come to him.

At dawn, he arose, redressing into his worn suit, but who was he trying to impress? Moving out of the bedroom, he could still hear the snores from the room opposite-Buckbeak was also snoring away. He would leave them for a moments longer. Moving down the stairs he felt his stomach do its familiar rumble, but he ignored it. He didn't know when people would start arriving, so immediately went outside, wincing at the bright sun. Pulling out the watch that was given to him as he came of age, he looked at the time. Nearly 6am.

One by one, as the hours passed on, wizards and witches arrived, some he recognized immediately, all past members, some new, some embraced him with kind smiles. The Weasleys came into view, and he felt a bit of comfort at the sight of a select few members of the ministry, who followed.

"Remus," a gruff voice called, as Remus turned heal, and saw the familiar limp of Alastor Moody. "You wont believe it," he gruffed, as he hobbled down the cobblestone, followed by a very distracted witch, walking backwards, her hair a violent shade of Pink, and a light about her that caused Remus to take a second glance. She was walking backwards, and tripped slightly before catching herself. "Remus, Nymphadora Tonks."

"Wotcher!" she said with a bright smile.

"Hello," he said bowing her head slightly. "Mad-Eye I'm sure you know?"

"Yes yes," he said. "That blasted elf have coffee on? I've been through hell," he grumbled as he moved towards the door, which was only apparent to those who knew it existed. "Train this prat myself," he added stepping through the door, leaving Remus standing on the street with the pink-haired witch.

"I'm not really a prat," she said with a grin. Remus took a moment, and let out a chuckle, shaking his head. "So we just going to stay outside or are you gonna take me inside?" she asked brightly. "Mad-Eye never told me the address…"

"Of course," Remus replied. "A few minutes, and we will go in," he added. "I'm Remus Lupin."

"Tonks," she replied brightly. "So what do you do? Remus Lupin?"

"I bring people inside," he teased, a small smile twitching at his lips.

"Nobel work," Tonks grinned, as Remus let out a quick laugh and looked around.

"Mad-Eye trained you? Must be an Auror?"

"Yes sir, before he retired, as he claimed someone had to take over for his tired ass," Tonks recalled, as she leaned against the fence. "Who we waiting for?"

"I think just the Hogwarts staff," he replied with look around. "Probably coming in with Dumbledore," he added. With that, a pop, and the Hogwarts staff arrived, all looking tired.

"Ah Remus, Nymphadora, so nice of you to wait for us," Dumbledore greeted with a smile. "I believe this is all who are arriving, please quickly inside, we have plenty to talk about." Extending his arm towards the door, Remus entered, followed by a very bouncy witch, and the staff. "Everyone is in the kitchen I presume, excellent," Dumbledore spoke, as the door to the kitchen opened, and about thirty or so people crammed in the kitchen.

Remus quickly found a vacant spot, on the counter, and jumped onto it, as his eyes followed the room, chattering ceased, as Dumbeldore took his spot at the head of the table, left vacant by everyone.

"Thank you all for coming," he spoke. "You all know why I have called you." A collective 'yeses' and nods were spoken, as everyone looked around. "We have some new faces, so those of you, welcome."

As the meeting progressed, the eager faces of those around the kitchen turned more somber, not like they weren't expecting it: they were. Voldemort was back, and they did not know how long they had until it was all over. The details were many, there was no denying the second war was on the brink.

Remus feared this, he feared losing the only friend he had left: Sirius. He feared losing Harry, and fear what the world would be like, if they lost. He shared the fear, the witches and wizards around him, all barred the same look upon their faces, as they were being told the first phase of the New Order.

"The prophecy," he stated, "is Voldemort's greatest tool in defeating us, it needs to be protected. We need to make sure everyone is on duty in pairs, no excuses, he can not get his hands on the prophecy."

"What does the prophecy say?" a voice asked from the crowd.

"Not important," Dumbledore dismissed. "What is important is that everyone understands the severity of this. We need to keep strong, and united. Recruit who you can, but I warn you now, be on the lookout, there will be Death Eaters everywhere."

A few people glanced around the room, eyes briefly resting on Severus Snape, who stood beside Dumbledore. "Trust those in this room, inexplicitly, without prejudice."

Remus looked around, and made eye contact with the bumble-gum pink haired witch, whose mouth slowly formed a smile, as she gave him a wink, before turning her attention back to the older man talking. They were on to Harry himself, and the plan of protection.

"Why not bring him here right away?" Hestia Jones asked as several people nodded in the question.

"Not an option," Remus said out of the blue.

"Remus is right. The night Lily Potter sacrificed herself, she placed a magical protection on Harry, which means as long as he calls the Muggles place home, he is safe. We can not break that protective enchantment early, unless there is no other choice."

Remus sighed, crossing his arms across his chest, he leaned against the counter, briefly closing his eyes.

"In the mean time, we need to make sure Harry is watched at all times, we will be each taking shifts. Minerva will have your schedules, and your watch partners. I don't need to remind you, we are preparing for war."


	2. Chapter 2

Vouchsafe then, O thou most Almighty Spright,

From whom all gifts of wit and knowledge flow,

To shed into my breast some sparkling light

Of thine eternal truth, that I may show

Some little beams to mortal eyes below

Of that immortal beauty, there with thee,

Which in my weak distraughted mind I see;

Draped in an invisibility cloak, Remus sat on the ground in front the hedge outside Number 4 Privet Drive. He had just relieved Emmaline and Kingsley. When he apparated into Arabella Figg's livingroom, he was quickly fed, and hurried out onto the street. Now midnight, and his attention was quickly taken away from the house he was watching, to a noise of trash cans being knocked over. He quickly stood up, pointing his wand preparing to fire a stunning spell. He lowered the wand as he noticed a slight mess of pink hair peak out of the cloak the witch let slip.

"Sorry!" She said in a loud whisper.

"You'll wake the neighbourhood," Remus sighed as she gave him the most guilty look. "I thought I was with Hestia tonight."

"She's with Sturgis," Tonks replied. "So I was sent." Moving to the hedge she plopped down beside Remus. "Anything happen yet?"

"No, I don't expect anything either," Remus said lazily. "Number 7 had a midnight visitor to what I am hoping is the girls room."

"A midnight bootie call?" Tonks grinned brightly as she folded the invisibility cloak on her lap.

"Put that back on, we can't be seen," Remus said quickly.

"Ah, no need," she dismissed. "I'm an Auror, I have other ways of protecting us." Giving him a wink, she lifted her wand, and made a few motions. "There."

"May I ask?"

"Muggle Repeller, and a simple silencing spell. We can't really move much, but at least I'm not talking to the great invisible man." Remus chuckled and pulled the cloak off, as he leaned back into the hedge. "So Remus Lupin who Lupin, the man who doesn't talk much. What does it that you do?"

Remus looked at the young bright haired witch and back to the house, taking a breath before speaking: "I was a teacher, previously, I have been doing a fair bit of research as of late."

"A teacher? That explains it," with Remus look, Tonks continued. "This mysterious, silent type, I definitely see it. An air of sex appeal, power," Remus tried to interrupt but Tonks continued. "It makes sense, you being a teacher. Now let me guess what subject?" Looking at him, Tonks drew her bottom lip in between her teeth as she surveyed him. "Defense Against the Dark Arts."

Remus bowed his head, with a soft smile in the direction of the young witch. "Quite perceptive."

"That's my job!" she grinned brightly, as she moved her hands behind her head and leaned fully back. "We're moving him next week."

"You're part of the Advanced Guard?" Remus asked.

"Best Aurors were picked," she explained as she did a sweet around them with her eyes. "Guess I'm the best."

Laughing, Remus perked his head and placed a finger to his lips, as he noticed a light turn on in Privet Drive. Tonks nodded and stood up, wand tight in her hand. Without a word spoken, she shot into the air, upon reaching the window in question, she transformed her face into that of a birds, before quickly returning down. Shaking her head, she looked at Remus. "Not him. The other boy."

"What was that you just did?" Remus asked, waving his hand in a vague manner over her face. "You're not a metamorphmagus?"

"That I am," she answered. "Super helpful passing Auror training, let me tell you. I can do almost anything you like. Mad-Eye said that was really the only reason he didn't pass me off to Kingsley."

"I would have," Remus teased. Remus never imagined that spending six hours with the young witch would be as entertaining as it was. There was an ease about her, that he had never felt before. He couldn't put his finger on it, but it was something.

They spent the hours talking, about everything and anything, cracking jokes, and poking fun at one another. There was never an awkward moment, and the silences that did occur were one of those accepting of the others need. With the sun rising, Remus knew their shift was coming to an end, and a part of him felt disappointed that they would be going their separate ways.

It had been years since he was able to just talk to someone, without the fear they would be scared away from what he was. She was talking again, as they entered the house, their safe apparation point. He wasn't even aware of the moment she grabbed his hand, until they were standing on the street of Grimmauld Place. Pulling off the invisibility cloak, she grinned, before bouncing up the steps.

"You coming?"

"Yes," Remus said shaking his head following her up the steps. The hallway was dark and quiet, both knew not to make a noise, as to prevent the barbaric yelling that would emerge from the Walburga Black portrait that hung in the hallway. Quickly the two moved down the hallway to the light of the kitchen. It wasn't until Tonks tripped over the umbrella stand that the screams from the portrait began. Groaning, Remus waved his hand and quickly moved her into the kitchen.

"Sorry!"

"No need to apologize dear," Molly Weasley smiled from the stove. "Fancy a bite to eat you two?"

"That would be lovely, thank you Mrs. Weasley," Tonks grinned taking the plate she was offered.

"Thank you Molly," Remus echoed.

"Oh Remus, Severus dropped this off, he said you need to drink it," she said passing along a bottle, that bared the unmistakable Wolfsbane Potion. "He said he will be in all this week with it."

"Thank you," Remus mumbled taking the potion.

"Wolfsbane Potion?" Tonks asked, her mouth full of flapjacks. "Youre a werewolf?" Remus said nothing as Molly turned her head. "Not like there is anything wrong, just didn't know."

"What didn't you know?" Sirius Black asked walking into the kitchen, as he watched his friend take the full amount of potion in one fateful swig. "That Moony here is a werewolf? That's why we're friends really."

"I'm sure," Remus said shaking his head and sitting down at the table with his plate of flapjacks and sausage.

"Sirius, have some breakfast," Molly ordered placing a plate on the table for him. "Sit. Eat."

Not daring to disobey the mother, the two men picked up their forks and started to eat. Breakfast in Grimmauld place was soon joined by a pack of red-headed children making their way in, all rubbing sleep out of their eyes, but taking the plates their mother handed them with a smile and a mumbled 'thank you'.

"Professor Lupin taught me how to get rid of a Boggart," Ron explained with a mouth full of food. "Best Defense Against the Darks Arts teacher yet mate."

"Thank you Ron, but I'm sure anyone could have taught you how to rid a Boggart," Remus said leaning back.

"I dunno Professor Lupin, I doubt anyone could have taught Ron," George teased from his spot at the table. "Though he was right, best Defense professor."

"Thank you," Remus said bowing his head in thanks. In his one year at Hogwarts as a Professor, Remus had felt accepted, and even to the point respected by all. Much like how he felt being a member of the Order, no one seemed to care in the slightest what his condition was. In fact, he seemed to be the pet project of a one Molly Weasley, who every time he stepped foot in Headquarters, would proclaim he looked peckish, and would provide him with food. He knew that is how Molly needed to cope with everything that was going on, and he didn't blame her.

"When I was there, I was totally in love with the Potions teacher," Tonks said resting her chin in her folded hands.

"Professor Snape?" Fred asked, mouth agape, as all the Weasley children stared at her.

Sirius has spit out his pumpkin juice and burst out into riotous laughter, as Remus' eyes widened.

"I was a kid, my tastes have changed!" She defended making eye contact with Remus.

"Ho-ho!" Sirius laughed as he was hit by Remus. "Tonks my dear, dear cousin. You make my life! Hah! I'm going to need a minute to recover."

"Sirius," Remus scolded as the man still laughing.

"Snivilus, Moony!" Sirius shot back as he quickly regained composure. "Sorry."

"You're a git," Tonks said with an eye roll. "When you're a 13 year old girl, you make doe eyes for anyone."

"What house were you in?" Ginny asked quickly changing the subject, it was quite evident that she had clearly become quite intrigued by Tonks, and what she was.

"A Nobel Hufflepuff!" Tonks ginned brightly. "Never wanted any other house."

"You used to nik into the kitchen?" Fred asked with a knowing grin.

"The house elves were wonderful! Would make you damn near anything. It was brilliant."

"It's what I've always told you." Fred said turning to his twin.

"Handy with the common room being so close! I could usually make it there and back without McGonagall catching me!"

"I always knew Miss Tonks," Minerva McGonagall said with a knowing smile as she entered the kitchen. "I'm here for only a few moments. Albus would like to have a volunteer or two to bring Miss Granger to Headquarters this week. He feels it is important that we bring her into the fold."

"I can," Remus and Tonks said instantaneously raising their hands.

"Excellent," McGonagall smiled at the two, pulling out the piece of parchment and handing it to Remus. "Thank you. I must be off, please use means of non-trackable magic, due to her still being underage."

"Of course," Remus said as he flipped the parchment and scimed it with his eyes.

"Goodbye," she said leaving the kitchen, as the Weasley children stared. Tonks leaned over, placing her chin on her hand.

"It's so weird seeing teachers out of school," Tonks said to the twins, both nodded knowingly.

"Like a dancing hippogriff," Fred agreed.

"Yup," George, Ron, Ginny, and Tonks said instantly.

The rest of breakfast was spent chatting, and Molly giving instructions for the days cleaning tasks. Finishing her third helping of pancakes, Tonks grinned and turned to Remus who was reading the morning's Daily Prophet.

"You ready professor?" she asked with a large grin.

"Side by Side Apparition?" Remus asked, looking up from the paper.

"Non-magical means," Tonks reminded him. "Where does this girl live?"

"Laverstock, Salisbury," Remus said looking at the parchment. "I suppose we could take the underground."

"Sounds brilliant!" Tonks grinned standing up. "Actually, maybe you should let me shower first. Sirius, any place I can shower in this house, or am I forced to go home?"

"Bathroom, second floor, besides Regulas' bedroom," Sirius replied with a smile. "Moony, you need a shower too?"

"I'll be fine," Remus replied as he lifted his tea cup to his mouth.

"Give me like, 30!" Tonks bounced out of the kitchen, and her stumbling up the stairs was heard with a few "Craps!".

"You're smitten."

"What are you talking about?" Remus asked setting down the paper, turning his attention to his friend. 

"The pink haired relation of mine," Sirius said with a cheshire grin. "You're smitten."

"I hardly think so," Remus replied. "She's a child."

"Uh huh," the man grinned knowing. "Then tell me, Master Moody, why have you been one to volunteer to be her partner?" A waggle of eyebrows caused Remus to laugh.

"It's just work. Now if you don't mind, Dora had a point, showering might be good, seeing as the journey to get Miss Granger is at least 2 hours."

"You can go and join her," Sirius grinned widely with a wink.

"Sirius Black!" Molly's voice rang through the kitchen. "I am giving you 2 minutes to come up here."

"You better go," Remus said standing up, and taking his tea cup to the sink. "I'm going to shower."

Remus walked out of the kitchen, and into the darkened hallway. He was not smitten with Tonks, to be honest he barely knew her. They had known each other for a month, and really, after 8 hours of sitting with her, and the impending 4 hours today, he only saw the two being that of friends.


	3. Chapter 3

That with the glory of so goodly sight

The hearts of men, which fondly here admire

Fair seeming shews, and feed on vain delight,

Transported with celestial desire

Of those fair forms, may lift themselves up higher,

And learn to love, with zealous humble duty,

Th' eternal fountain of that heavenly beauty.

Waking up, Nymphadora Tonks stretched her hands above her head, and blinked open, taking in the bright rays of sunshine. Her body ached, and she knew she was not getting enough sleep, as the small throb behind her eyes spoke to the truth. Between work, and all the missions and duties for the Order was getting to her. The quick nap would have to do, knowing that she was going to have to meet Remus downstairs in a few minutes. She had been working nearly every day of the week, for either the Ministry or the Order, and sometimes, it was double shifts, if not triple. Today was one of those triple: she had night shift last night for the Order, worked all day for the Ministry, and was back on night shift for the Order. The only perk about tonights shift, as that she was not alone in the Department of Mysteries, instead, she and Remus were on duty scoping out Death Eater's homes.

Remus Lupin, he was something else. Out of all her partners, he was her favourite to be around. Certainly they were friends, easy friends it seemed. They didn't have to try when it came to finding topics of conversation, the laughs came easy. They had only met in June, and it felt, to her, that they were friends of a lifetime. Remus seemed to get her, and never asked her to change her appearance for fun.

Moody had never really given her the choice on not being in the Order, not like she was going to say no. He arrived at her door, groaning about something and dragged her out, saying no kid of his was not going to fight this fight.

Shaking her head, her hair changed, to a more subdued light purple, and straightening her shirt, she moved downstairs. The house was full of chatter, and she figured most of the Order was in the house, as to why, she was unsure. Yawning once again, she made her way down the stairs of Grimmauld Place.

It was going to be a long night, Moody had her working all day, and she was on duty tonight: she and Remus were going to scout out new Death Eater's homes. Blinking, albeit, extra long, she quickly lost her footing, and a small shriek emerged from her lips faster than she knew.

"I got you!" a voice said as she fell into the body owning the voice. "I got you." Opening her eyes, she saw the familiar face of her partner.

"I'm sorry, you must think I'm an utter clutz," Tonks said as she pulled away slightly, but still leaning onto him, to stand on her own two feet, so that he wasn't bearing all her weight.

"No, not at all," Remus smiled. "It's endearing." Smiling back at him, a red blush rising to her cheeks, and her hair changing its colour, without her control. The two stared at each other momentarily, she still resting slightly in his arms, as a voice interrupted them.

"Whatcha doing?" Sirius asked, standing at the bottom of the stair rail, smiling wickedly at them.

"Tripped," Tonks started pulling herself out of his arms, and straightening up.

"Caught her," Remus finished quickly shoving his hands into the pockets of his sweater. Remus lowered his head, as Tonks moved by him.

"Stop being a prat," she grumbled to her cousin.

"Come on cuz," Sirius grinned, his eyebrows wagging.

"The order is here?" she asked, ignoring him, as she gave Sirius a shove on the shoulder.

"Dementors," Sirius said seriously, his expression changed. "Attacked Harry, in Little Whinging."

"What?" Tonks asked, her eyes widening, and she moved into the kitchen. Remus turned heel and followed her, as Sirius sighed, shaking his head, and moved towards the group of people, all chatting loudly, voicing their concerns and ideas for Harry.

Tonks grabbed a chair, and waited, almost impatiently, as Remus took the remaining chair next to her. The room quickly came to a halt in all conversation as Dumbledore entered the room. It was now a whole different war, they could all feel it.

The meeting went on for what seemed like hours, but in reality, only about half an hour. An advanced guard set up, who would be taking Harry from his home at the end of the week. The usual banter at meetings, was not there, as they felt the tension and anger in Dumbledore was flowing out into the kitchen.

"Remus, Nymphadora," Dumbledore spoke, softer than what he was in the meeting, "you two need to get going. Now. Sirius will fill you in upon your return in the morning."

Without protest, the two stood up, and quickly left the kitchen, shutting the door behind them, as they spotted the Weasley children, and Hermione standing at the top of the stairs. "What happened?" they all asked, looks of worry upon their faces.

"Don't you worry about it," Remus said, almost angrily, as he guided Tonks out of the house. She gave a half smile to the children, as she moved out of the house.

They stood on the stoop of Number 12 Grimmauld Place, they stood in silence, breathing was the only thing that was heard by either. She didn't know what to do, or if she should say anything. She could feel his frustration, anger, sadness, and worry, it was radiating off him, and she hoped, she really hoped, that this is what he needed: to just stand in silence.

She was quite taken aback when she felt his hand, callused and dry, take a hold of her hand. She took a quick intake of breath, and turned her head to look at where they connected: he slide his fingers to thread with hers, as his eyes closed and the two disapperated.

"Where are we?" Tonks softly asked, as she looked around, not recgonizing where they had appeared. She could still feel the warmth of his hand in hers, but knew in a moment, he would realise, and remove his hand. And that's just what he did.

"Shepherd's Bush," Remus replied, almost immediately pulling his wand out. Nodding, Tonks removed hers from its spot up her sleeve, Mad-Eye would rant at her if he had known. Casting the usual spells and enchantments to conceal the pair, Tonks leaned down against a tree.

They sat in silence for what seemed like an eternity for Tonks: she was after all, more of an extrovert than Remus could ever be. He was the most introverted person she would consider to be her friend. She needed to be with people to thrive, to joke with, to laugh with. But Remus, he could survive on solitude. There was something enlightening about the whole relationship. She knew, somehow, that he was comfortable enough to not talk, but cast a glance at her every now and then, that she was the person he wanted to be around tonight, not Sirius, not the Weasleys, but her. And she found that comforting, that their level of friendship was now at the level of silent comforting.

After two hours, Tonks inhaled, and dropped her head to lay on Remus' shoulder, which she could tell startled him slightly, but he relaxed once more, but not looking at her. "You okay?" she asked in barely a whisper.

Not answering for a moment, Remus took a breath and slowly turned his head to look at her the best he could. "I am, thank you for asking."

"That's what friends are for," Tonks smiled, as she lifted her head off his shoulder. "We make sure the other is good."

Not responding, Remus turned his attention back to the house they were staking out. But she could feel that it was okay, that he was okay, or at least would be.

There was something about Remus Lupin, something she couldn't put her finger on, but it was something important, something she had never felt before with a man, or a woman for that matter. But it was growing, in the pit of her soul, or was it her heart?


	4. Chapter 4

Beginning then below, with th' easy view

Of this base world, subject to fleshly eye,

From thence to mount aloft, by order due,

To contemplation of th' immortal sky;

Of the soare falcon so I learn to fly,

That flags awhile her fluttering wings beneath,

Till she herself for stronger flight can breathe.

He could feel it coming: the full moon. Every sense was heightened, he was itching to move, constantly. He was getting restless, regretting decisions he had made to stay with Sirius in Grimmauld Place, regretting allowing Severus to brew Wolfsbane Potion for him, and taking it. He knew it was just the full moon talking, but he regretted most things in terms of the moon's cycle.

He knew the instant she walked in the door, he could smell her: grapefruit, lavender, and cupcakes, moist vanilla cupcakes. Every part of her had a scent, that melded together. It was an odd combination of scents, but Nymphadora Tonks was not that of an ordinary witch. Her hair, that of lavender, which usually he caught by her sitting by him, or walking by. Her soap, grapefruit, which was as fresh as the fruit; that he caught when he reached across him. And finally the vanilla cupcake, her moisturizer, used daily, her hands always smelt the sweet aroma. He breathed in deeply, as he closed his eyes.

Exhaling, Remus continued to make his tea. He had always liked a good cup of tea, of any variety. It calmed his nerves and settled his wits; pouring the water over the tea leaves, just as she tripped into the kitchen.

"What are you doing here?" Remus asked, a bemused smile on his face. Grabbing the honey from the cupboard, he put a spoonful in and stirred it in.

"Day off," Tonks smiled. "Figured we haven't had any 'fun' lately."

"We're in the middle of a war," Remus reminded, turning around, holding his mug. "Cuppa?"

"Yes please!" Moving to the counter, Remus held a hand up.

"No, please sit," he said softly, gesturing to the table, as one hand reached to grab another mug from the rack.

"Well, it doesn't mean we can't have fun, to remind us that we are still human," Tonks said, taking the mug that Remus offered to her. "So whatcha say?"

"What did you have in mind?" Remus asked, leaning against the counter, staring at the pink-haired woman in front of him. His senses were working overtime, he was having a hard time concentrating on anything but the smell of her, the brightness of her hair, the glowing nature of her skin, the sweet sound of her voice.

"That is a good question," Tonks said bringing her tea to her lips. "Now, we could play Gobstones, or Chess, or if you want, exploding snap, but we could always leave this dreadful house, head to Diagon Alley. We could go shopping. I need new boots, and want to take a look at a new broom. You could use something that isn't moth holed," she winked putting a finger through Remus' sweater hole.

"And we leave Sirius?" Remus asked, raising his eyebrow. He knew his friend was more than bored being stuck in the house, but in reality, he couldn't leave.

"Well, I know a way we can bring him, but that would require him to behave," Tonks winked as she drank her tea. "And be silent."

"Like that is possible," Remus grinned into his cup. He knew his friend was upstairs, feeding Buckbeak, and was more than restless to get out.

"True, so what do you say? We play around here for a bit, and then spend the afternoon shopping?" He had to admit, her enthusiasm was infectious. He could feel it radiating off her, as she impatiently sat and fidgeted. He felt like a teenage boy again, sixteen, hormones raging for a girl who showed him more interest than his best friend.

It was just the moon phase, he told himself, just the moon phase. He watched her eyes light up, as if an idea formed in her head. She quickly downed her tea before going "Hot! Oh that's hotter than I thought. So hot!" Jumping off her chair, she quickly took Remus' mug from his hand, bringing that to her lips. "Hot hot hot!" she said shaking her hands and sticking her tongue out repeatedly while fanning it with her hand. Taking a few laboured breaths, she grinned. "Come on!" Taking a hold of his hand, she winked at him and pulled him.

Remus was in paralyzed shock at the whole situation, but allowed himself to be taken by the woman, who pulled him out of the house. The two made it to the stoop, as the door slammed, and they could hear the portrait screaming behind the door, as they disapperated.

"Sometimes," she started letting go of his hand with a smile. "Its best to just go for it." They were standing in Diagon Alley. Remus stood there staring at her, her smile captivating, and her eyes shining. It was the moon phase he reminded himself, nothing more. "Come on, we can go and find something to bring Sirius back. I'm sure he will be pissed that we left."

Remus nodded his head, holding out a hand, gesturing her to guide him. She flashed him a full tooth grin, and walked with a bounce in her step. It was the moon phase, he chided himself. It wasn't like he didn't enjoy spending time with this woman, because it was the contrary, he loved the moments they got to spend together, talking about nothing in particular, how she treated him with such reverence, but then, like now, would be her spontaneous self, and try and include him as much as she could.

This was against his nature, he liked to plan, and carefully orchestrate those plans. Days off, he prefered to be quiet, to read and understand the world around him; but this was nice. Usually, any days off they both had together, which was rare, and usually involved her skiving work, they would be at the house, and he, laying on the couch, reading, recovering from the night prior-his full moon. Those days, he never wanted to end, they were quiet, and relaxed, and although his body ached all over, and he felt like moving would cause his bones to break, those afternoons were well spent.

By the time they had arrived back to Grimmauld place, Remus was in the possession of a brand new sweater, that Tonks said quite frankly, suited him far better than the old ragged one he was wearing. She had a few bags, which he carried, because his parents taught him no matter what, chivalry was not dead.

"Lookie here," Sirius grinned as the two walked into the living area, and Remus placed her bags on the armchair. "Went shopping did we?"

"I got something for you!" Tonks grinned, as she gave Remus a wink, pulling out a magazine. "Quiddich!"

"This makes up for leaving me all alone in the house while you two had a little trist down Diagon Alley?" Sirius asked, looking at the two.

"Don't be so melodramatic Sirius," Remus sighed as he moved to sit down on the couch. "She needed to get a few things, and I needed a few things for the end of the week."

"Uh huh," Sirius said as he flipped open the magazine. Remus rolled his eyes, and looked at his friend. Sirius had been bugging him almost daily about his relationship with the young woman. As soon as Dumbledore assigned them as partners, Sirius made it his personal mission to try and embarrass the pair any way he could, both together and separate.

"So tell me Nymphadora," Sirius started as he watched his cousin's hair turn bright red, he grinned before he continued with a wink. "Was he good?"

"A perfect gentleman," Tonks replied with a smile. "Now, Remus wasn't much help, but which broom should I get?" she asked, flopping down on the couch beside Sirius holding out a magazine. "I would love a Firebolt, but its not really work practical, so I'm thinking maybe something more, like a upgraded Cleansweep or a Nimbus."

The rest of the afternoon blew by as the three sat and chatted over a few pots of tea. They were interrupted by none other than Dumbledore, who entered the living area with a mischievous smile.

"Good afternoon," he said softly, as Remus and Sirius nodded, and Tonks quickly straightened up.

"Good afternoon Professor Dumbledore," she said, almost nervously, as she smiled. Remus smiled softly as he turned his attention to the older wizard.

"Tea?" he offered, as Dumbledore raised a hand in thanks.

"Alas, no time, merely dropping off your potion Remus," he said softly. "Severus would like me to remind you, every day."

"Of course," Remus bowed his head in thanks.

"I must be off, but one more thing," Dumbledore said, a smile playing on his lips. "Laughter and love in the these times are the only way we will succeed. It is nice seeing it in action." With that, the older wizard moved out of the room, and the three could hear the door to the entrance close. It wasn't five minutes later, that the door opened again, and Remus knew it was Molly Weasley, from the sound of bags being set down on the kitchen table.

"I should help," Tonks said jumping up from her position on the couch, and bounced out of the living room. Remus watched her move, as she passed by him, he caught a whiff of her: grapefruit, lavender, and vanilla cupcake. He closed his eyes to take in the scent, let it wash over him.

It was comforting, he decided, her scent.

It was the full moon.

"You going to admit it Moony?" Sirius' voice broke Remus from his thought, as he looked at his friend.

"It's nothing. We're friends."

"And I'm a monkey's uncle," Sirius replied standing up, walking past his friend, he placed a hand on his shoulder. "Go for it. The worst that can happen, is no."

Remus looked at his friend, and gave him a look, mixed between confusion and acceptance. Sirius always had a way of knowing how his friends were feeling, and being as much as an insensitive jerk as he was a caring human being. Squeezing his friend's shoulder, Sirius walked out of the room, and Remus heard him volunteering to help the two women in the kitchen.

Remus didn't know what to think, because at the moment, he could only smell her, and imagining everything with the smell of her.

It was, after all, only the phase of the moon.


	5. Chapter 5

Then look, who list thy gazeful eyes to feed

With sight of that is fair, look on the frame

Of this wide universe, and therein reed

The endless kinds of creatures which by name

Thou canst not count, much less their natures aim;

All which are made with wondrous wise respect,

And all with admirable beauty deckt.

Remus opened his eyes, he could feel every bone in his body ache. His muscles screamed with agony, like they always did the morning after a full moon. But now, as winter was approaching, the definite chill in air was making not only his bones creak, but the ache, far worse.

Groaning, he made his way to stand, feeling his knees crack. Grabbing his robe, Remus briefly considered walking up the 3 flights of stairs to his bedroom in Grimmauld place. His body only scratched in a few places, and it didn't warrant any immediate care. The concrete was cold on his feet, and Remus closed his eyes, before he apparated upstairs. It was barely dawn, and he could still hear Sirius' loud snores from the room across the hall. After 7 years of sharing a dorm with Sirius the snorer, James the talker, and Peter the mover, he had learnt to sleep through anything.

"Hi," a soft voice said causing Remus to turn his attention towards the bed, where sitting upon the duvets, cross legged, a soft smile on her face.

"Hi," he said, barely audible back, mostly from shock. His senses, still heightened, but his exhaustion dulling them slightly. He could smell her, more vanilla cupcake than normal, she must have recently applied her moisturizer.

"Come," she said moving towards the wall, and grabbing the duvet, turning it down, gesturing for him to crawl into bed. "You must be tired."

"What are you doing here?" Remus asked, not moving but staring at the woman still sitting on his bed.

"I couldn't sleep, all I was thinking about was that you would need someone to take care of you today. So, I came here. I brought you chocolate," she replied sheepishly, holding up a bag of chocolate chips. "All I had in my flat."

Remus let out a small, short laugh, before moving towards the bed. No matter how much he fought it, his body was begging to rest. Climbing into his bed, Remus involuntarily relaxed his body almost immediately, his eyes shut, as his hand sank into the pillow. He felt the weight next to him shift, the bed creaked a bit, and then he felt the soft, vanilla cupcake smelling fingers, touch his head, gently moving through his hair.

He didn't know when he fell asleep, or how long, but when he opened his eyes, he knew she was no longer sitting on the bed, but he could still smell her, albeit, faintly. Blinking slowly, he rolled to his side, to see her sitting on the chair in the corner, wand glowing, and her nose in a book. She had her pointer finger between her teeth, as she read.

"You're up," she said, feeling his gaze on her. Closing her book, she smiled softly at him.

"How long have I been asleep?" he asked, stretching, feeling the age of his body, and the tightness and soreness of his muscles.

"Eight hours, give or take," she replied. "You hungry? Molly made chicken stew and biscuits."

"Sounds delicious," he replied softly, groaning at his movement.

"Well, you go take a shower, I'll go heat up some stew," she smiled, standing up, and placing her book on the chair. Giving him a wink, she exited the room.

Remus watched her leave, his mind still in confusion as to why she was there, why she taking care of him, and more importantly, why was he letting her. There were several options, all of which seemed logical: Sirius knew how the cold affected him during transformations, and she being his friend, decided to help; he was getting older, more tired after every transformation, she saw this, and being his friend, she was being kind, and helping; or she cared about him as much as James, Sirius, and Peter did-she was his friend.

Getting out of bed, Remus could feel his knees crack, and he heaved himself up. Taking in a breath, he yawned, and moved steadily into the bathroom adjacent to his bedroom. The house was quiet, he could hear unrecognizable conversations, nor who was in the house. But it was November, and the Order knew, day after the full moon, he wasn't seen. Sirius usually remained downstairs, letting his friend sleep, usually coming upstairs, once or twice, with a sandwich. Usually with a "you doin' all right mate?" "need anything else?".

Stepping into the shower, Remus groaned as the water his his skin, but relaxing against the tile wall. He let the water wash over him, he wasn't particularly dirty, but the the warm water was easing the pain in his bones and muscles. Remus closed his eyes, as the water drops calmed him.

He didn't remain in the shower for long, and wrapped his waist in a towel, realising he had left clothes in the bedroom. He looked around, at the bathrobe that was mildly blood stained from the scratches. He also considered grabbing another towel, to cover his scars that were scattered over his chest. He somehow knew Tonks would be sitting in the bedroom, and although they were -just friends- he was not prepared to have his body seen. It was then he noticed a folded pile of clothing, that were his, sitting on the closed toilet seat. Tonks. Taking a breath, he reached for the pile of clothing, and dressing. She had chosen a pair of loose fitting trousers, worn, and a cotton polo shirt, his new sweater. His feet were still bare, but he prefered it that way. Hanging the towel on its rack, Remus moved back into the bedroom, his body wanting to go rest once again.

And there she was, sitting on the bed, again, a tray on the bedside table, chicken stew, buns, and tea, and a bag of chocolate chips. She had a few boxes on the bed, and smiled at him. "I hope those are all right, I kind of just pulled from the wardrobe," she replied.

"Tonks," Remus started softly as she held up her hand to silence him.

"Please," she said. "I'm your friend right? Friends help, without questions. I've been watching you Remus, for months now, and after the full moon, you're tired, sore, and to be honest, a bit grumpy. So I planned, I planned to meet you here, and let you sleep, be there when you woke up, provide you with something warm to eat, and drink, and maybe, play a game, or build a puzzle," she was speaking almost without taking a breath, and Remus just watched her talk. "I mean, I thought that maybe you'd like to someone to spend time with. I can leave you know...if you want…"

"No, that's okay," Remus replied, a soft twitch at the corner of his lips forming the hints of a smile. "We are friends."

Beaming, Tonks stuck her tongue's tip between her teeth, as her eyes lit up. "We're friends. Now be a good friend and do something with me. Actually, no. Eat first." Remus shook his head, and moved towards the bed, sitting down. Bringing his legs to rest on the bed, he waved moved his finger so that the tray floated towards him, and rested on his lap. "I'm rubbish at household spells and charms, Molly made everything."

"Who's downstairs?" Remus asked as he broke the bun, and dipped one in the warm chicken stew.

"Oh um," Tonks started, as she scrunched her nose. "Sturgis and Kingsley. Uh, oh, the Weasleys, Sirius, and Ally."

"Ally?" Remus asked, raising his brow, as he continued to eat.

"Moody," Tonks grinned wickedly. "Don't tell him I told you, he'd hex me. That or he'd find a way to have me slowly tortured, by doing desk work for the next three hundred years." Remus laughed as the now blue haired witch smiled. "I like you better when you're happy."

"Thank you," Remus said putting his spoon down.

"Not good?"

"No, it is," Remus explained "I'm not that hungry. It's normal after the moon," he continued.

"Right," Tonks nodded. "well, its not like, you know, you can't eat later, besides, we still have chocolate!" grabbing the bag, she grinned at him. "So now that you've eaten, did you want to nap again, or maybe play a game?"

Remus was tired, it was true, and his body could use another few hours of sleep, but the look of hope that dressed her face was somehow lifting his exhaustion. She had given up her day to be with him, made sure she was there when he moved to his bedroom, she made sure he had food, a shower, clean clothes, books, and her company. Normally he wanted to be alone, but on this particular day, he was perfectly content to be in her company.

"So I have a game I think you'd like," she said pulling out a red box. "Scrabble. My dad's muggle born you see, and he loved this game. Nana too," she continued.

"And what's the purpose of Scrabble?" Remus asked, as took the remaining boxes and levitated them to the small table by the chair. He saw the complete joy in her face, as she mildly jumped as she wiggled her butt, and and opened the box.

"Okay so, its a word game," she began, her eyes lighting up, as she pulled the contents out. The rest of the afternoon and evening was spent playing the board game, which Remus had to admit, was harder than he first thought. Seven letters, and they had to make words, as ridiculous as it sounded to him, she was much better than he anticipated. She kept score, the first time, to show him, her 238 to his 174 was challenged in the next round. As the two sat on the bed, a board between them, letters slipping and being slid back into place. There was laughter, and conversation, and contemptment. There was one thing that Remus knew from this day, not only was he quite amused by this young woman, and her clumsy nature, her sense of humour, her need for there to be some sort of joy in this world; despite all that was happening. But most of all, he was becoming impressed by her intense loyalty, and friendship, that despite what he was, didn't care, and treated him as if he was for the first time since he lost his friends, a human.

Sirius bade farewell to the houseguests, after the small Order meeting that occurred. He hadn't seen or heard from Remus all day, but he knew his friend, and knew that he was probably still sleeping. Grabbing a few buns that Molly had left behind, and a glass of milk-he remembered Remus prefered milk over pumpkin juice, and made his way up the stairs. Briefly stopping for a moment, he moved back downstairs, grabbing the tin of cookies Molly had also left, placing the buns on top of that, before returning to the stairs. Climbing them, Sirius made it to the second floor, smiling when he noticed Remus' door still open, and the lights on.

"Hey Moony," Sirius said entering the room, and the sight before him, brought the first true smile to his face. The tray Tonks brought up earlier was still on the bedside table, and his eyes drifted to the bed, there was a board game laying in the middle of the two, Remus' leaning against the headboard, sleeping, while his cousin on the other side of the board, was fast asleep with one arm over her head, and the other mere inches away from Remus' other hand.

Leaning against the door frame, Sirius smiled, and wished he had a camera, because he knew, come morning, his best friend would wake, and he would start shutting himself away again. There was something Sirius had to admit, at watching the two interact while both were in the house, and even when she wasn't, his friend, his best friend, was happier. Granted Remus was introverted, preferred to read, or do puzzles, but somehow, this woman, his cousin, technicolour hair and all, was able to get him to talk, and smile. And for that, Sirius was eternally grateful. Taking his buns, cookies, and milk, Sirius turned heel and walked into his mother's room, where Buckbeak was laying. "Cookies or buns?" he asked the animal. As much as Sirius loved what was developing, he knew, that he was losing his last best friend to love.


	6. Chapter 6

First th' earth, on adamantine pillars founded,

Amid the sea engirt with brazen bands;

Then th' air still flitting, but yet firmly bounded

On every side, with piles of flaming brands,

Never consum'd, nor quench'd with mortal hands;

And last, that mighty shining crystal wall,

Wherewith he hath encompassed this All.

_He could feel her warm skin get goosebumps under the calluses that adorned his hands. He felt her shiver under his touch, and that brought a high level of arousal to him. Because Merlin, this was Tonks, and she was biting down on his collar bone gently, letting his hands travel to their content. Hers were busy slipping under his shirt, and he shivered with delight, and he could feel the smile forming. His hand found the back of her bra, as her lips captured his, and he could feel the blood rush from his head, as one of his hands slid up her torso to grab a breast, eliciting a gasp of pleasure._

"_Remus…" she murmured..._

"Remus?" the voice stirred Remus' slumber, as he flickered his eyes open.

"What is it?" he mumbled, blinking his eyes open, staring at his friend.

"It's Arthur," Sirius said. "Come on, the kids are coming." And in that instant, Remus bounded from bed, his dream still in the forefront of his mind. Similar dreams had been plaguing his dreams for weeks, since the morning after he spent the day with Tonks, and they had fallen asleep together. He woke up that morning, with her head buried into his chest, and his arms around her, she had left a bit of drool on his shirt. Their scrabble board was under her body, albeit barely, and the letters were all over the bed and floor. He could still smell her hair, and the feel of her soft vanilla cupcake skin under his fingers. She was far more compact than he anticipated, but he wasn't complaining, because for the first time, in a long time, he felt whole.

"What happened?" Remus asked trying to distract himself from the vision of the woman, who kept his thoughts more than occupied.

"Attacked, on duty, possibly dead. I have to get downstairs," Sirius said. "Mad-Eye says to go get Tonks, she'll know."

"Of course," Remus said, moving quickly to the wardrobe. Sirius patted his friend on the back, before exiting the room. Remus rubbed his eyes with a hand, and pulled out a pair of clean robes, sliding them over his body. Attacked...possibly dead. Faster than he ever imagined, Remus was out the door, on the stoop of Number 12. He realised briefly, that he had no idea exactly where she lived, a flat by the ministry. Taking caution to the wind, Remus closed his eyes, thinking: Nymphadora Tonks' flat, and his disaperated.

Appearing on step of a flat in downtown London. He stood for a moment disorientated, but looked at the door in front of him. Should he knock, or merely enter at will. It was late at night, and he could imagine she was sleeping. Placing a hand on the door, he thought about knocking. No, it was an emergency, he whispered "Alohamora" and heard the locks open, as he placed his hand on the doorknob, and opened.

Immediately, he knew this flat belonged to her. There were shoes and boots littered around the entrance, and cloaks hanging beside the door. Not particularly knowing which way her bedroom was, he glanced to his right, her kitchen, small, and dishes and food littered the counter. The kitchen table couldn't be considered a place to eat, parchments littered it, quills and grocery bags. Her bookshelves were filled, which made him smile, she was incredibly well versed and articulate when she deemed the situation necessary. His eyes shifted to two doors as he walked through the flat, figuring one the bathroom, the other her bedroom. He moved into the bedroom. The sight before him made him take a deep breath. She was flat on her back, a blanket barely covering her torso, her legs bare, but a pair of short shorts. Remus' eyes travelled upwards to her torso, and the thin, almost see through tank top she was wearing. He could see the outline of her breasts, and her chest rising and falling with each breath. He didn't want to wake her peaceful slumber, but they both knew the Order came before sleep. Moving to her bed, he sat down, and reached across to touch her cheek. "Dora…"

And then there was a wand in his face, her hair bright red, as her eyes flew open. "Oh god, Remus!" she said dropping her wand and touching his face. "Did I hurt you?"

"No," he replied touching his cheek where she had almost hexed him.

"Good, now my next question, what are you doing in my bed?" Moving and bringing her knees to her chest, she looked at him. "Not that I don't mind your company, but generally I'm awake, or we're both naked," she added with a wink.

Ignoring the comment Remus took a breath. "Arthur has been attacked while on duty at the Ministry," she explained. As soon as the words came out of his mouth, she nearly jumped over him, effectively knocking him over a bit, as she reached for a robe that was lying in a heap on the floor.

"What happened what do you know?" she demanded pulling the clothing over her head. "A bra...fuck."

"Not much. He is being taken to St. Mungos, possibly he's dead," Remus replied, it pained him to think that Arthur would be taken from this world. "Mad-Eye is already at Headquarters, or was going to be there as soon as I left to come get you."

"We have to go now," she said grabbing her wand from the bed, and Remus' hand. "Ministry first."

"But," Remus said as Tonks pulled him out of the bedroom, and through her small flat.

"I know what to do, trust me." With that, she pushed him out of her door, and waved her wand at it, before taking his hand and disaperating.

Remus had never really been pulled through the Ministry before, nor had it occurred in the middle of the night. She had not let go of his hand, and it wasn't like he had pulled away. She had pulled him into the Auror office, and straight to her desk, as she let go, she immediately started rifling through the piles of parchment, and drawers.

"What are you looking for?" Remus asked, as he looked at her desk.

"Ah hah!" she declared, tossing Remus what appeared to be an invisibility cloak. "Put this on. Come on. Remus, I need you to trust me. Please." Remus nodded, and wrapped the cloak around his body, and the hood over his head. She was moving at lightening speed, with all the grace she usually lacked. "Where is that bloody fucking foe glass?" she grumbled as she quickly moved a few Sneakescopes and grabbed it. Shoving it into her shirt, she grabbed two of her Sneakescopes and reached for Remus' hand. Taking a hold of it, she quickly pulled them back towards the lift. "Yes, I can see you," she explained, at the look of confusion on his face. "There is a lot of things that go into being the youngest Auror, a lot of abilities." He opened his mouth to speak, as she held up her hand. "You can't talk. I was trained by Mad-Eye, they all expect me to talk to myself."

The lift stopped and Tonks quickly moved to stand in front of Remus, letting go of his hand. She knew no one else could see him, but there was something for protecting him.

"Tonks, what are you doing here?" the wizard asked, raising a brow.

"Mad-Eye is swearing at someone has been in his yard again," Tonks lied with a shrug. "Demanded I bring him my Sneakescopes, because obviously his are not working, and I figured my foe-glass would be helpful too. Really I just want that old bat to let me sleep." The older wizard let out a laugh.

"Didn't we all warn you for accepting his mentorship," the wizard said.

"Yeah, but then I wouldn't have you as a partner you prat," she grinned elbowing the wizard. "So why are you here anyway?"

"Scrimgeour has be running the office tonight," he replied. As the lift stopped on the main floor, she winked.

"Have fun Seb!" flashing her smile, the two moved quickly out of the lift, waiting for it to close. "We have to take the back stairs. I need you to keep tight to me, say nothing, until I tell you."

As the two moved quickly, down the stairs, Remus stayed as close to the woman as he could. He was definitely confused as to what they were doing, especially seeing as his only instructions were to fetch her, and now here he was under an invisibility cloak, following her through the back stairs, to what he could only guess was the department of mysteries. In the months he had known Tonks, she would routinely trip, fall, or drop something, on a daily basis, but here she was almost running down flights of stairs, with boot laces around her feet, one hand holding two sneakescopes, and arm cradling the foe glass, her other hand gripped into his, which was covered by the invisibility cloak. Almost sliding into the circlular black room, Remus felt his heart suddenly drop. She looked around, and headed for a door, opening it, they stepped in. Letting go over her wand, she pulled her wand and shoved it in Kingsley Shakesbolt's face, and he to hers.

"What was the first thing I told you upon getting your badge?" he asked her, his eyes glaring into the whites.

"You will change the career of being an Auror," she replied. "What was the first thing you taught me in Auror training?"

"How to tie your shoelaces," Kingsley replied, looking down at her shoes. "Although I'm sure I should have re-taught you that lesson."

"Bite me" Tonks replied. "Remus, you can take the cloak off." Obeying the young woman, Remus pulled the cloak off.

"Kinglsey," he nodded towards the taller wizard.

"Remus," Kinglsey nodded back before turning his attention to the Auror. "You have them?"

"Two, plus my foe glass, the spare one, Remus is holding my spare cloak," passing the objects in her hands to Kingsley, she reached into her pocket. "And, I have this," pulling out what seemed to be a simple lighter. Remus looked at it, and then at Kingsley, who seemed to know what the object was.

"You have one?"

"Gift, from Moody, when I graduated," she shrugged. "Damn handy, let me tell you."

"Does anyone else know you own it?"

"Not that I know, maybe Seb, but I think he just thinks I smoke," she added. Remus watched as she flicked it open, and lit it, and before their eyes smoke figures started to appear, and the scene materialized. They watched the smoke figures, one being Arthur looking around, and then, the snake slithered up.

"Just as we thought," Kingsley said in a barely audible whisper.

"Just got the message," a voice said, belonging to Hestia. "Robins is up in the office, I can't get anything."

"Tonks grabbed her spares," Kingsley replied, handing over a Sneakescope and the Foe Glass. Hestia lifted the glass to her eye level, and then back at the three.

"Remus, what are you doing here?"

"He came with me," Tonks spoke quickly. "Speaking of which, I'm going to get to Mad-Eye. We all know he won't stop harping on me if I don't make it there."

"Tonks, before you go see Mad-Eye," Kingsley smirked, "I would suggest putting your bra on under your robes."

Tonks looked at her superior, to Hestia, down to herself and then to Remus. "Why didn't you say something!" She almost in a yellow, gently swatting Remus at the chest. "You were right there while I was getting dressed!"

"I...I…" Remus stuttered, not really knowing the answer. Did he realise? Not at all, she moved them at almost lightening speed, from the moment the words escaped his mouth, it had been less than 10 minutes ago since he first entered her flat. "All so fast…" he mumbled.

Tonks dropped her head. "I thought I was doing so good!" she chuckled.

"You put clothes on this time," Kingsley winked. "Better than the last time Mad-Eye called you in. I seem to remember there was only a cloak being worn."

"We're going back to my flat first, and then to Mad-Eye," and with that, she took ahold of Remus' hand again, and pulled him to walk with her. They walked for a few moments in silence, and Remus could feel the tension being relieved from her body. Moving out of the Department of Mysteries and up the same flights of stairs, they moved back into the Atrium.

"You're impressive," Remus finally said, as the two exited the Ministry and onto the street.

"What do you mean?" Tonks asked, finally letting go of his hand, and running her hand through the mess that was her hair.

"In less than 10 minutes, you apparated two people, found the robes with that weird smoke lighter, got to your desk, found everything, and made it down to to the Department of Mysteries, all without having a single clumsy moment," Remus explained. "It's impressive."

"They don't just let the average wizard pass Auror training you know," Tonks grinned, as she lightly hit him with her elbow. "Thank you." Bowing his head, the two walked down the street. "By the way, I live in walking distance of the Ministry, didn't have time earlier to walk the fifteen minutes."

"Oh, here," Remus stopped, and removed his cloak, handing it to the young witch, who smiled brightly back at him, and he felt something inside of him bubble up inside of him. She wrapped the cloak around her body, and leaned into him a bit, offering her thanks. Because even on a night where one of their own could be dead, his heart was relieved it was not her.


	7. Chapter 7

_By view whereof it plainly may appear,_

_That still as every thing doth upward tend,_

_And further is from earth, so still more clear_

_And fair it grows, till to his perfect end_

_Of purest beauty it at last ascend;_

_Air more than water, fire much more than air,_

_And heaven than fire, appears more pure and fair._

Yawning, Tonks stood in front the mirror, her hair changing colours and lengths. It had been a long few weeks, everyone was now in pairs for all Order missions, and no one was to arrive alone, or leave alone. Partners were being rotated, no two shifts in a row were the same. No one had set days anymore, which meant for Tonks, who stood there changing her hair, was now chronically yawning. They were trying to pair anyone who was was on duty with the prophecy with an Auror, or have one on either end, so perform undetectable disillusionment charms. Settling black curls, she grabbed an elastic hair tie, and pulled the hip long hair into a pony-tail.

Normally she wouldn't care what she looked like, but tonights partner, was her favorite. Remus Lupin. At first she had merely thought they could be fantastic friends, and they already had a close relationship, but now, now there was something else, something she had never truly felt about anyone. He would elicit butterflies in her stomach, at the easiest of smiles. He was easy to talk to, and she started looking for excuses to spend time with him. At first it was helping clean Headquarters, and she hadn't really realised she was doing it. But then, she was getting more and more excited to be paired with him for missions, and started taking a bit more pride in how she presented herself. Her hair, trying to find the one style, that he mentioned, or paid extra attention to. But then there was the day she spent with him, recovering from the moon, the most wonderful day, she got to see a part of him that she was sure it was something he reserved for his friends.

Then they fell asleep in the same bed, and she woke up curled into his warm body, and she knew then, that whatever this was, it was not a schoolgirl crush, it was something more now. Sure she romantically involved with a few boys, being a whole 23 years old, she knew very well that what she had, wasn't love, because if it was, she'd be with them still. She went through a lot of life events with her previous boyfriends...

Her first boyfriend, at the age of 13 was a fellow Hufflepuff, Eli Dickson, he was a year older than her, and at the time, she loved him, oh did she love him. They dated for two years, and everyone knew that Eli and Tonks were an item-until he cheated on her with that awful Charlotte March. After Eli, there was Sam Harper, a Ravenclaw, he was in 7th year when she was in 5th, and she thought they were more in love than Eli. Their relationship started hot and heavy, right off the bat. After she finished her OWLs and he his NEWTs, thinking that at the end of this year he would leave her, she slept with him, knowing that she wouldn't see him next year all the time. She never really regretted giving up her virginity to Sam, because gosh she loved him, but he didn't last past that summer. Sixth year, she there were two, Amiens Joffrey and Scotty McKindrict, neither of them lasted long. Then in the last year, Dicky Pierce, he asked her out in August, his family lived over the hill, and she had grown up with him as her friend. He was the only one who never really asked her to change parts of her, to suit their wants and desires. Sam was like that, asked her to change her body to suit his fantasies. Dicky wasn't like that all. So they started dating, it was a bit awkward at first, and he gave her butterflies. They went through the most together….They would get detentions together, ended up once in Professor Dumbledore's office, were caught skiving class to shag, her idea, and Professor Sprout caught them, down to their knickers. She got two howlers for that. They studied for hours on end together, she would help him brew potions, and they would spend their spare hours working through herbology greenhouse, mostly in detention from Professor Sprout. Then school ended, they went back home for the summer, and owls started to arrive with their NEWT marks, they sat in the corn field. She received outstandings in Charms, Transfiguration, Herbology, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Potions, Astronomy, and Ancient Ruins. Dicky wasn't so lucky, and they had laid in the corn field for hours, talking options, promising that they were going to do whatever they had to, to be together, if Dicky didn't get high enough marks, they would find something else to do, to be together. That evening, Rufus Scrimgeour arrived at her house's front door, followed by Alastor Moody. She remembers that day like it was yesterday.

"_Mr and Mrs. Tonks? Is Nymphadora in?" a voice asked, and Tonks groaned at the use of her name. "I'm Rufus Scrimgeour, this is Alastor Moody, we're from the Ministry of Magic."_

"_Of course, come in," Ted said welcoming the two into the house. _

"_Nymphadora Tonks?" Scrimgeour asked as the young woman nodded, her orange hair being twirled by her finger._

"_I'm Rufus Scrimgeour, head of the Auror Department, this is Alastor Moody," he gestured to the older gentleman. "May we sit?"_

"_Yeah, of course," Tonks replied sitting back on the couch, staring at the two, as Andromeda and Ted stood in the doorway. _

"_We are here because of your application to join the Auror program. Pomona Sprout, head of your house, submitted your application prior to graduation from Hogwarts, with all your current grades. Your application essay was of superb quality, we also recieved your NEWT marks this morning. They were, the highest we have seen in years, I spoke with your examiners, to see exactly what marks you achieved. Miss Tonks, you should be incredibly proud of yourself, you received 100% on all your written and practical examinations."_

"_I was the last person to achieve those types of marks," the other wizard spoke, as Tonks looked at him. _

"_That being said, Miss Tonks, we would like you to begin Auror Training, at the start of August. We have four slots opening for training alone, and would like you to take one of those."_

"_What?" Tonks asked, her eyes wide and her chair changing colour on its own, out of shock._

"_What did you just do?" Scrimgeour asked looking back at Tonks' parents._

"_She's a metamorphangus," Ted said from the doorway. "Born."_

_Moody looked back at her parents, his magical eye focussing on her. "You will report to the Ministry of Magic at 5am, August 1st."_

"_Alastor?" Scrimgeour asked, ignoring the comment._

"_Never."_

"_Miss Tonks, we know this is a shock, but we will need an answer by tomorrow evening at the latest."_

"_Listen Kid," Moody spoke, finally to her. "You are damn special, damn talented, and damn smart, I read your exams, and I spoke to your examiners, said you could do things with a wand that no one in your year could. You have something in you, don't waste it." _

She had told Dicky that night, snuck out of the house, and ran through the corn fields, and up into his climbed up the trellis, and into his bed, and told him everything. She knew that if he told her to go, she would, if he told her not to go, she would go. She left two days later, knowing that they couldn't be together if she was going to be an Auror.

Dicky married over a year later, she was sent an invitation to the wedding, and never went. Her heart hurt too much to attend. She had lost the first boy she was in love with, or at least thought she loved, Dicky never made her feel the same way spending time with Remus does. Somehow, Remus easily worked his way into her heart, and connected with her, on a level, she had no idea was even possible.

So here she was, changing her hair, for a boy, who never once asked her to change her appearance for his gratification. She wasn't purposely trying to garner his attention, she just, for once, wanted to look pretty for a boy...a man.

Pulling herself from the bathroom mirror, she walked back into the busy Auror office, the 24 wizards that occupied the cubicles were all talking to one another, about something or other.

"Oo, who's the bloke?" Ethan Proudfoot asked looking up from his desk.

"There is no bloke Ethan," Tonks groaned as she slid back into her desk, and picked up a map.

"Sure sure," Proudfoot grinned widely. "Tonks got herself a bloke!" he announced loudly to the other men in the office. Being the only single woman in the office, meant that Tonks took her share of being picked on by the rest of the men. She knew it was all in good fun, as she would dish it right back but this time, this time, talking about Remus, she felt a blush rise over her face.

"Who is he?" Stephen Savage asked, as he leaned over his cubicle wall, wagging his eyebrows. "She's blushing!"

"Leave her alone," Matilda Astaire groaned rolling her eyes, being the only other female in the Auror office, who was at least twenty years older than Tonks herself, and was married to Savages' partner, John Astaire.

"I'm with them," the male Astaire grinned, as he dodged a quill being tossed at him from his wife.

"Who's the bloke?" Savage repeated. "Tonks does not change her hair for no one other than Moody, and lets be honest, we'd all change our appearance for that manky git."

"You know he's in there with Scrimgeour?" Kingsley said gesturing to the office behind them. Savage went white, as Tonks burst out laughing. If it was one thing she knew, as well as the entire office, she was the only one who could say anything negative about Alastor Moody. "Now leave Tonks alone, and get back to work. I'm sure she'll blab who the gentleman is tomorrow," he winked at her. In fact, Tonks was quite aware that Kingsley knew who she was spending the night with.

As if on queue, the door opened, and in a great wave, everyone in the office grabbed their quills and pretended they were working.

"Hey...uh...Tonks, can I borrow that map?" Savage awkwardly requested as he reached taking the map from her hands, and sinking back behind his cubicle, as Moody's eye whizzed around the room.

"Nymphadora," Moody grumbled as he walked over to her desk.

"Yes," Tonks started, rolling her head back and looking up at him, "Ally?" A smirk making its way upon her features, as all the others in the office, awkwardly tried to watch, and not be seen.

"There is suspicious activities in my neighbourhood," he grumbled. "You will infiltrate the houses tonight."

"She can't, she has a date," Savage grinned. "A hot smokin' date."

"Shut your trap," Tonks said grabbing her paper weight and throwing it at him. It stopped mid-air, as her eyes moved towards Moody, who had his wand pointing at it. "Fine, I'll be there, you owe me, big. Huge even. I'll make a list of what I need, and want. You can pick from there." Moody grumbled, something inaudible, and whipped his wand, tossing the paper weight back to Tonks' desk, before walking out of the office.

"All of you, get back to work," Scrimgeour said from the doorway to his office, before closing it with force.

"Does anyone have any droobles?" Tonks asked, looking around at her co-workers. It was going to be a long hour until she could leave. There were several chuckles, and three packs flew to her desk.

The next sixty minutes, Tonks was having a hard time concentrating, as she worked on tracking death eaters in the North of Scotland. Remus kept creeping up into her thoughts, his laugh, his dry wit, everything they did together. She had to admit to herself, that she was in love. Not forty-five minutes later, she stood up, and groaned. "I'm going, if Scrimgeour comes out of that office, tell him anything."

"Got it," Sebastian Robins winked, as everyone else grinned to themselves. Tonks heaved a large breath, and left the office, dragging her boot clad feet. It wasn't like it was a date, it was a mission, simple as that. She shouldn't be as excited as she was to spend an evening in his company.

It was moments like this, that Tonks wished she had more female friends, but as it was, there was really only two people in the world she would want to talk to about this: Remus, and Johannah Thompson, the only friend from Hogwarts who she was able to keep in touch with over the years of Auror training-while she was doing Healer Training. Checking her watch, Tonks sighed, knowing that a trip to see Johannah was not the best idea, she would be late for meeting Remus. Exiting the ministry, she walked to the Safe Area, and disapparated immediately. Entering Grimmauld place, glancing at her watch, she realised she still had an hour and a half, and she walked through the main hallway, towards the kitchen, hoping to find someone. The kitchen was empty, minus Kreacher who was wiping the table with a dirty cloth.

"You know, the cloth needs to be clean," she told the elf.

"Kreacher does not listen to the blood traitor's daughter, Kreacher knows she is unnatural filth," the elf spoke to himself.

"Whatever," Tonks mumbled rolling her eyes, and leaving the kitchen. She moved into the library, and smiled at the sight in front of her. Remus and Sirius were sitting across from each other, Sirius had his elbows on his knees, as he was leaning over the chessboard. Remus, across from him, legs crossed, had a book open, and his eyes moving over the pages, evidently waiting for his friend to make a move. She stood there and watched as Sirius moved his Knight.

"Your turn," Sirius spoke, as Remus closed his book, placing his finger to hold the page. Looking at the board, a small smile stretched over his lips and he reached over, moved his queen to capture Sirius' knight.

"Check," and with that, Remus lifted his book back up to his face. Tonks watched in the doorway for a few moments longer, before she felt Remus' eyes on her, and her heart began to pound widely in her chest, the butterflies in her stomach started swarming, and she felt heat rise up her cheeks. "Hi."

"Hi," she breathed.

"You know, I forgot why I only played chess with Wormtail," Sirius bitterly remarked as he leaned back in his chair. Tonks smiled as she walked into the room, taking her customary seat on the couch, next to Remus. She sat closer to him than she had five months ago, but when he didn't shift away, but laid his book on the table beside him. Sirius was concentrating on the game, his face scrunching up.

"I didn't expect you for a few more hours," Remus spoke softly to her, turning his head to look at the woman. Tonks never realised how much she loved his voice, the velvet smoothless of it, the softness of his words when it was directed at her, in a private moment.

"Nothing to do at work, so I left," she replied. "I thought maybe you wanted to have supper before, you know, our shift," she tentatively said, her fingers playing with each other. She could feel the heat in her face rise again. Did she actually just ask him that, ask him out for supper, on a date. Was it a date? They were two friends right, and that doesn't always mean that a meal shared together was a date.

"Sounds delightful," he smiled at her, as he glanced over at Sirius who quickly removed Remus' queen from the board.

"Ah hah! Beat that Moony," Sirius grinned wickedly stretching out his arms, and resting his hands behind his head. "

Remus turned fully away from Tonks, and she felt her heart pitter patter in her chest, as he looked at the board. "I would like to finish this game, before we go," he spoke moving a rook to an empty space.

"Of course," Tonks grinned. She noticed one thing when it came to Remus, he never referred to her as Tonks, in fact, he rarely said her name directly to her. He skirted around it, and she didn't know why, but she had ideas, albeit, girl in love ideas.

"Can I come?" Sirius asked, looking at the pair.

"Sirius," Remus' voice spoke softly. "We can't let you leave, it's too dangerous." Before Sirius could retort, a Lynx burst into the middle of the library, and Tonks' Auror communicator started to wail.

**Breakout at Azkaban. Ministry lost control of Dementors. **

Tonks stood up, as she drew her wand from her holster, and disapparated, leaving Remus and Sirius to sit and stare as the Lynx who repeated the message again, before vanishing.


	8. Chapter 8

_Look thou no further, but affix thine eye_

_On that bright, shiny, round, still moving mass,_

_The house of blessed gods, which men call sky,_

_All sow'd with glist'ring stars more thick than grass,_

_Whereof each other doth in brightness pass,_

_But those two most, which ruling night and day,_

_As king and queen, the heavens' empire sway;_

Remus hadn't slept, and for the first time in as long as Remus could remember, Sirius had beat him at chess. His mind was elsewhere, it was in fact, on a young witch who invited him for supper, and disappeared. He had no idea what was going on, if she was safe, if she wasn't damaged somehow, his heart ached immensely.

Sirius watched his best friend, and has been watching his best friend for six months, watched every little nuance of the man he grew up with, thought he knew. Granted, he spent twelve years in Azkaban, and Remus grew up without him. He in a cell, his best friend in a larger one, while people ignored and belittled him. For Sirius, his heart hurt watching Remus, his melancholy was something that he couldn't fix. He had been watching his friend fall for his cousin, fall for a woman that was almost half his age. In Hogwarts, he would have nervous to talk to her, and James, Peter and Sirius would have set up everything to make sure that Remus and said girl would run into each other, or they would have to sit beside each other in class. But they weren't teenagers, and this was not school. This was war.

"She'll be fine Moony," he whispered softly as he set up for another game of chess. "This is her job."

"I don't know what you're talking about," Remus said shaking his head, moving his pieces to their rightful place on the board. In fact, Remus knew, Merlin did he know that his best friend was feeling that he was being replaced. Remus didn't know when it started to happen, or if he was doing it on purpose, but it was one thing that was true, he was starting to worry when she was not in his sight.

"Sirius," Remus started, almost accusingly.

"Look my friend," Sirius started, inhaling for a moment, collecting his thoughts. "Do you ever think about James and Lily?"

"Are you serious?" Remus almost shouted.

"Settle down," Sirius rolled his eyes. "Like actually think about them. Not just that they're dead, and that we will never see them again. Because that is not what we need to think about. But actually about them, what they were like, what was good about each of them. How Lily would stay up with you as you two studied for every class. Remember when Lily told us she was pregnant, and the joy in her face, and how she leaped into your arms, and my arms, and even Peter's. And how James was beaming, and how he said that he promised Lily that he wouldn't say anything? Or the day they got married, and we stood beside him, and watched Lily walk down that aisle? Do you remember that sparkle in her eyes, and how James puffed his chest out, and elbowed us? Why did we spend nearly six years trying to get those two together? Because we all saw something that James didn't, that hell, Lily didn't realise. They grew to love each other. They probably always loved each other."

"Sirius, what are you talking about?"

"Or, after that full moon, where you decided you wanted to spend it with the other wolves, and Lily laid you in bed, and washed those wounds, and she bandaged you, she threatened me and James, and Wormtail to stay away. Told us that we didn't understand you like she did. Or how, from the moment she found out about you, would always leave a new book beside your bed after a full moon, because she knew you, she knew us better than everyone."

"I remember," Remus softly whispered. "I remember everything about James and Lily."

"Then maybe Remus," Sirius breathed, in a rare occurrence of using his given name . "Maybe, she's your Lily." Remus looked at his friend, and blinked.

"She's my friend," he said, more of trying to convince himself of the statement more than Sirius.

"She's my friend too, and you're my friend. But let me say something, you don't look at me the same way you look at her," he explained softly. "It's the same way James always looked at Lily."

"Sirius, you're out of line," Remus chided, knowing that his friend was right, but wasn't about to admit it.

"No, I don't think I am," the other retorted leaning back in his chair. "There was a time where you craved happiness, and acceptance."

"Times change Sirius," Remus said, staring his friend down.

"Yes times change, you think I don't know that? I've been stuck in this house since July! Seven months Remus. I was stuck in Azkaban for twelve years, you don't think I changed? The only way I stayed sane was hoping that one of us was going to be happy."

"Life is not a fairy tale Sirius."

"No shit," Sirius said. "Our best friend and his wife are dead, our other, a traitor who let them get killed, you're a fucking werewolf, and there is no happiness left in my life! But, you know what Remus, I may not be the one who is happily married, I never wanted a wife, but I did everything possible to bring James and Lily together. And I will do the same for you." Standing up, Sirius walked briskly out of the library leaving his friend alone. Remus groaned as his gaze followed his friend. Sirius always had an innate ability to know exactly what people were feeling, even if they had no idea. It was something that Remus envied in his friend, to look past everything, and see what was really there.

Remus walked back into Grimmauld place earlier than he expected, Emmaline joined him in place of Tonks, and he felt his heart drop that he wasn't going to spend an evening in her company. It was a quiet shift, and they were relieved early, as per Dumbledore's request. Entering his bedroom, Remus dropped his cloak on a chair, and sat on the bed, dropping his face into his hands.

"Hi," a voice said from the doorway, as Remus lifted his head, and looked at the woman, standing in the doorway. Her skin was greyer than normal, her hair, a mousey brown, her eyes lacked their usual twinkle. Her robes, were dripping wet, and there was no delightful lilt in her voice.

Remus immediately stood up, and moved towards her. "What happened?" she opened her mouth to speak, but no words came out as she let out a breath and her shoulders fell. He knew, oh he knew, she had spent hours in Azkaban...Before he knew it, her arms were wrapped around him, and her head buried into his chest. It took a moment for him to react, as he felt her body relax slightly into his, as his arms wrapped around her.

His heart pounded in his chest, as he tightened his grip. He could feel himself getting wet from her robes, and he gently pulled away. "You're all wet."

"Yea," she mumbled with a sniffle.

"I'll make you a cup of cocoa," Remus mumbled touching her cheek. "Change into something dry." Stroking her cheek with his thumb, he dropped his hand and left the room. She spent hours in the presence of Dementors, she needed chocolate. Not knowing what the kitchen had to hold, Remus moved into the darkened kitchen. Moving to the cupboard, Remus began searching for something to help with her darkened demeanor. The darkest, foulest creature to ever inhabit the earth, was easily remedied by chocolate, the irony was not lost on him, it never had been.

Many a time he made the journey to Azkaban, needing to know why Sirius did it, why he betrayed everyone. But he would arrive, and know that that day, he couldn't do it, he couldn't look into the man's eyes and demand an answer. Life wasn't like that, it wasn't so simple, Remus never could muster the courage to make his way to the cell. He regretted it, every day, because if he knew, if he knew, Sirius would not be now locked away in this house.

The kettle's whistling broke his musings, and he moved to pour the hot liquid over the powdered chocolate he located. Stirring it, he placed a sauce over top, to prevent it spilling, before leaving the kitchen, and moving upstairs. He could hear Sirius sleeping, and it brought small comfort to him, knowing that at least his friend was not hiding away under protest or anger. Moving into his lightly lit bedroom, he noticed Dora, sitting on the bed, her knees pulled to her chest, she was wearing a pair of his trousers, and the moth eaten sweater she told him to get rid of. She still looked like there was no happiness whatsoever in her body.

"I made you some cocoa," he said softly, walking to the bed handing it to her. "Drink, it'll help."

"We lost 10 prisoners, the Lestranges, Dolohov, Rookwood, Harrow, Mustow, the Carrows, Carslile, and Ipswich. We don't know how they got out," she started, sipping on the cocoa. Kingsley is leaking that it was Sirius that helped them escape." Remus remained quiet, as he sat on the edge of the bed. "We got there, they were angry, the dementors, and they were feeding off every one of us. The other prisoners were trying to distract us, there was just too much. Zechariah was the first one who lost his patronus, one by one, we couldn't keep happy…"

"The dementors have the ability to take everything away, nothing to be ashamed of…" Remus started but Tonks stopped him.

"I held off as long as I could, but then, all I could do was produce light. Scrimgeour was livid that they were able to get free. He expected us to have them rounded up within an hour. They didn't have wands, but Remus, somehow, somehow they got wands back. The visitor log, it was wiped clean, for all of them."

"It was planned…" Remus stated, staring into her eyes. "Dumbledore…"

"He knows," she said softly. He could see the warm cocoa was slowly bringing her colour back. He could tell that she was not herself, she was still pale, and her normal twinkle that inhabited her eyes on a daily basis were vacant.

"You're safe now," he whispered, leaning forward, and cupping her face in his hand, slowly running his thumb over her cheek.

Tonks stared at him, into the warmth of his eyes, and felt the heat from his hand. She could have gone anywhere tonight, to her parents, her mother would have fed her chocolate and rubbed her back, and her Dad would sit and read her a book, while this was happening. She could have visited Johannah, who would have drawn a bubble bath, and fed her chocolate. But the first place she could think of going was here, to him. To where she was safe.

Leaning her head forward, Remus felt his heart start thumping in his ears, as her head rested against his. He could feel her breathing in a steady rhythm, as his hand dropped from her cheek, and to his lap. He felt her hands take his, and he didn't pull away. "You're safe," he mouthed softly.

She could feel the heat of his skin, and her own heart thumping loudly, she could feel the warmth and happiness rise in her own body, absorbing everything he had into her own body. The butterflies started swarming again, and his thumb was running softly over the back of her own thumb. She sucked her bottom lip between her teeth once again, in anticipation.

"You're safe," he repeated.

"I'm safe," she agreed pulling her head away from his, and placing it on his chest, hearing his heart beat, feeling each thump, as she wrapped her arms around his torso. They stayed that way, for what seemed like forever, his arm moving up and down her back in comfort, her head tucked under his chin, inhaling his musk. "I love you." His breath hitched, and his heart thumped faster. Not knowing how to respond. She loved him. "You're my best friend."


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note: You can read the NC-17 (M) version of this chapter here. **

And tell me then, what hast thou ever seen

That to their beauty may compared be,

Or can the sight that is most sharp and keen

Endure their captain's flaming head to see?

How much less those, much higher in degree,

And so much fairer, and much more than these,

As these are fairer than the land and seas?

Winter was coming to a close, and the warmer weather was starting to peak its way into everyday life. There were routines built in, consistencies, in which everything that was uncertain in the current world, made it seem like everything would be all right. Like clockwork, Tonks would be standing in Remus' bedroom come the morning after the full moon, would clean his wounds, patch him up, and tuck him into bed. She would go to work, and be back by the time he woke, and they would lay in bed, and play scrabble or build puzzles. They took turns to reading to one another, one book at a time. He loved muggle novels, what his mother always considered to be classics, and she was growing to love them.

They hadn't talked about that night, when she whispered three words to him, he had completely ignored the statement, and other than the few full moons since that date, he would rarely look at her, or talk. On the evenings they spend together, curled in his bed, it was never spoken of or mentioned. She loved him, but in that moment, when he was the only happiness, and warmth, it came out. She wasn't sure she regretted saying it, but maybe, she regretted saying it so casually. But in true Remus fashion, he had started to become much more introverted, shutting himself away during the evenings when she was at headquarters. Any meeting, he sat quietly, hands in his lap, avoiding making eye contact; with the exception of those few stolen nights.

There was more than one night that Remus would sit alone in the kitchen, holding his tea cup, staring into the abyss of the liquid. Nymphadora was the only woman on his mind, all the time, there was no butterflies, but her safety, happiness, and well being, was first and foremost. His tea would become cold, and he would drink it anyway. On more than one occasion, Sirius would join him, and they would talk, about nothing in particular. Remus took the company with ease, knowing that if he avoided Sirius, it would be even worse.

And now, here they were, on duty, outside a brownstone in Liverpool, Remus leaning against a fence, hands tucked in his cloaks pockets, had firmly on his wand. Despite Tonks having disillusioning both bodies and placing a few protective enchantments, he remained quiet. It had been two months, two months since he realised that she captured a very large portion of his heart, and broke down the walls he so carefully put in place. Her delightful laughter brought his bubbling up from inside, her smile caused him to smile constantly when she was around. She was well read, incredibly smart, and talented for a witch her age. And she regarded him as nothing more than her best friend. She had said it herself, "you're my best friend". It had repeated over and over in his head since the moment she said it. But he had been avoiding her, he knew that if he kept the way they were going, he would fall deeper and deeper in love with her-love? Was that what he was feeling towards this woman? He had never felt it before, the constant warmth and happiness she elicited from deep inside him. But she was young, deserved better than a tired, lonely old werewolf, she deserved the world, everything he couldn't give her.

"He's still handsome, isn't he," her voice soft, and unwavering. "Even after Azkaban."

In that moment Remus realised something, that familiar sting in his chest, that he felt nearly every time a girl spoke to him. "He always got the women," He mumbled, not taking his gaze off the house in front of them.

"You'd know perfectly well who I've fallen for," her voice trembled slightly. "if you weren't too busy feeling sorry for yourself to notice!"

"But...Sirius? Or Robins?" His voice barely audible, his mind was racing.

"My cousin and my god damn partner!" She almost screamed, before realizing where they were. Holding her tongue, she looked at him. He could see the anger in her eyes, mixed with hurt, and something he could not recognize.

"Can we not discuss this here?" He almost pled. "Please."

"Fine, ignore it," Tonks groaned, before adding sarcastically, "like usual."

"I am not ignoring you Nymphadora. I just don't believe this is quite the forum we should be discussing the nature of our relationship." He knew she cringed at the use of her name, but she didn't argue it. He loved her name, and the way it rolled off his tongue like melted chocolate. It felt like her name should be on his tongue.

She didn't respond, but merely stared ahead, crossing her arms over her chest. He couldn't be certain in the darkness, her face only illuminated by the fading street lamps of a yellow tinge, but he could bet his life he saw tears building up in her eyes. Taking a large breath, Remus pulled a hand from his cloak, and reached out, tugging her folded arms by taking a hold of her hand. It was small, and soft compared to his, and she didn't pull away.

They remained quiet for the rest of the shift, neither speaking, neither acknowledging each other, just their interlaced fingers connecting them.

They entered Grimmauld Place, mutual ground-they could both feel free to leave to the safety of their own homes if it go out of hand. Did he expect a screaming match? Not out right, but he knew Nymphadora and he knew that she might not control her emotions as well as he. It was all part of her charm...

The house was quiet, it wasn't late, which meant Sirius probably went to bed early, sleeping was something he spent a great deal of time doing. They walked through the hallway, fingers still intertwined. Neither knew why, if it was for comfort or to make sure the other stayed, but neither made an effort to let go, until they made it into the living room. Both could tell Sirius had some sort of company earlier, probably the Weasleys, there was a dirty plate with pie crumbs.

"You wanted to talk," Tonks said, her voice steady, as she pulled her hand out of his grasp, and folded her arms over her chest.

"Yes," Remus started, he flexed his fingers, which now felt naked, and cold. "Sit."

"I would rather stand," she protested as she watched Remus sit down on his favourite couch.

"Suit yourself," he remarked quietly. He didn't know where to start, what he should say. "I'm a monster."

"No you're not!" She interrupted.

"I am, I am classified under a dangerous creature. Once a month I can cause more devastation than you can imagine." She remained silent, staring at him. "What I am saying Nymphadora, is that I am far too dangerous for you."

"No, I'm not accepting that excuse," she replied, her blue eyes, wrought with determination staring down at him. "In case you forgot, I am a witch, and a damn capable one!"

"I'm not doubting your abilities Nymphadora," Remus said, attempting to remain calm. "I am merely saying that I am a werewolf, will always be a werewolf! I can kill you, or worse, bite you!"

"Oh come off it!" She spat back.

Upstairs, Sirius sighed as he sat on the top most stair, a common place he would be during his childhood. He was torn between going downstairs and breaking up the fight, or letting it happen. The latter was winning, they were talking, or at the very least communicating. Which is more than they had been doing since January, he hoped that his friend would be able to look past himself, and accept the young woman. Granted he didn't really know Tonks, his mother was not one to let her boys socialize with the banished Andromeda Black, but he knew her well enough that she would fight for what she wanted. And so Sirius sat there, on the top most step listening to the yelling.

"So you're 13 years older than I am! How do you think that matters to me? I'm not a child!" She spat bitterly. "Stop treating me like one!"

"You are a child! For Merlin's sake, you just don't see it!"

"No I don't! Enlighten me?" Demanded Tonks, her hair now red with anger and both she and Remus were on their feet, freely using their arms to exaggerate their points.

"I'm too old for you! In a few years I'll be on my death bed, and you'll be in your prime."

"I'm on my death bed every day," she strongly retorted. "I hunt dark wizards for a living! Everyday I go to work I risk someone sending the killing curse my way!"

As the time past, almost and hour and a half had past since the two walked into the house. Sirius had moved downstairs, to the kitchen to retrieve a snack, he knew Remus better than anyone, and knew that until one of them broke, this fight would go on. He also knew come morning he had to pretend he heard nothing, knew nothing, and be there for his friend. Truth be told, this fight could be partially attributed to his meddling. Dumbledore had given him the task of setting the schedules, and every opportunity he could, he would purposefully place them together. He saw the way Remus looked at her, how she became a reference in every conversation they had. It was like school all over again, when he was quite enamoured with Florimell Gardinier, except one thing was different, Tonks was aware what he was, and didn't shy away. He had gotten her drunk one night, a full moon, they sat in the kitchen tossing back whiskey and tequila, and she spent the entire time drunkingly talking about Remus. The entire time. They seemed to be going well with a little prompting, then something happened, he didn't know what, but it ended up with them now yelling in the living area.

"I can't give you what you deserve! I can't keep a job!" Remus explained, louder than he anticipated.

"I don't need material things," Tonks tried to reason. "Why can't you understand that money is no object."

"Men are supposed to provide," he shot back.

"An old tradition. It has no bearing on us!" He was breaking down, she knew it. She knew Remus, like she knew herself. "Remus, listen to me, please, we care about each other, you can't deny it, you wouldn't be arguing with me if you didn't care. Neither of us knows what tomorrow holds, we're not seers, what we do know," her tone and volume became softer, "is that, today we care about each other, and today we're alive."

He watched her speak, and her body language changed, as her eyes started to glisten. Walking over, he let his tired body take control, he was tired of fighting, and brought her into his arms. As soon as her head tucked itself under his chin, he felt her body relax, and her arms slide around his waist.

"One day at a time, it's all I'm asking," she spoke into his collar bone. "You don't have to admit anything…"

"One day?" Remus murmured.

"One day," she confirmed. They stood there for a few minutes, his hand rubbing small circles of comfort, drinking in each others scents. The clock that stood in the corner chimed, and Remus lifted his head, looking at the clock, now reading 2am.

Tonks lifted her head, and looked up at him. In the soft light, and his visibly relaxed state, his scars less noticeable. He looked, dare she say, happy?

Knowing it was now or never, she took a breath and gently moved her arms to wrap around his neck, as she rose to her tip toes. Remus looked down at her face, and saw the familiar twinkle of mischievous in her eyes, as both leaned simultaneously and pressed their lips together. It was only for a moment, one that could have gone on forever, before they pulled away. She immediately sucked her lower lip between her teeth, as she looked at him.

"One day at a time," Remus smirked before he leaned in once more and captured her lips in another kiss. He could feel her body reacting, pressing into his, as her fingers started to gently caress the nape of his neck. They didn't have to admit anything, they just, had to take it one day at time.


	10. Chapter 10

Author's Note: You can read the NC-17 (M) version of this chapter here.

post/95855797658/chapter-10-nc-17-version

For far above these heavens, which here we see,

Be others far exceeding these in light,

Not bounded, not corrupt, as these same be,

But infinite in largeness and in height,

Unmoving, uncorrupt, and spotless bright,

That need no sun t' illuminate their spheres,

But their own native light far passing theirs.

Sirius groaned and rolled over in his bed, wishing himself to sleep, knowing full well that he probably shouldn't. It was not like he had gotten any sleep last night, between the argument that took place, and laying awake wondering if he was the one to blame for their friendship falling apart. The yelling stopped around 2am, and Sirius laid awake, tossing a ball in the air for hours, as his mind raced to what could have been said to Remus seeing him come morning. Finally giving up, Sirius crawled out of bed, dressed, and made his way out of his bedroom, noticing that Remus' door was shut, suggesting that his friend at least went to bed. Walking downstairs, he walked by Kreacher who was mumbling something about something-he never really paid close attention to the elf. The kitchen was how he left it, and began to shuffle around, it was Saturday, and Sirius knew that the house would be filled with Order members soon, for their bi-weekly meeting; Saturdays, when teachers could escape for a few hours under the pretense of visiting Hogsmeade. Sirius knew he still had a few hours before they would start arriving, and moved to make himself some breakfast.

By 8am, Sirius still had not heard or seen Remus emerge from his bedroom, the man usually was up with the sun, but he had no idea what time he had made his way to bed, prompting Sirius to stand in front of the closed bedroom door, debating waking his friend, or letting him sleep for a little while longer. His thoughts were interrupted by a knocking which Sirius knew, must be Molly and Arthur, leaving the door, he made his way downstairs, and through the darkened hallway, to open the front door for the Order members who would start arriving.

One by one, the house started to see members pop in for a chat before the meeting, and Sirius smiled at each one of his friends who came in. His mind kept floating upstairs, to Remus' room, concerned about his friend, and the potential down spiral of his relationship. Tonks usually arrived early to every meeting, but she wasn't there either, as more people started coming in.

"Has anyone seen Remus?" Kingsley asked looking around.

"Probably still sleeping, he and Tonks were on duty last night," Sirius said cautiously.

"Emmaline and I relieved them around 11pm," Hestia said.

"You know Remus, sometimes he just reads, and forgets to sleep," Sirius shrugged. "I'll go wake him."

"See if he knows where Tonks is too," Kingsley said. "Its not like her to be late, tripping over things yes, but that girl is always early."

"Sure," Sirius mumbled standing up. He didn't think it was his place to be the one to explain to the Order than the two members in question were up yelling at each other all night. But he was concerned for Remus, and thus made his way up the stairs.

Remus opened his eyes at the sun making its way into his bedroom, and blinked, feeling the warmth of the woman sleeping on him, made his heart swell. They had agreed, one day at a time, so until midnight he decided, he would be blissfully happy with this woman. Why he was allowing himself to indulge was something he didn't quite understand, but deeply, he wanted the illusion that he was normal, a human. He was brought out of his musings, at the feeling of her hand start to lightly scratch his chest. "Mmm, good morning," he whispered as he felt her kiss his chest. Tonks looked up, and smiled at him.

"Good morning," she smiled coyly. "It's still the same day."

"I am quite aware," he whispered, quiet enjoying her the fact that he got to see her at her utmost happiness.

Remus moved his hands so that they moved towards her hair, which turned into a caramel brown and long enough for him to run his hands through. Tonks smirked at the feel of his hands running through her hair, and sat up, winking at him, as she swung a leg over his torso that she was straddling him. Leaning down, she captured his lips with her own, and let her tongue sweep past his, as she felt his hands slide up her thighs and rest on her hips.

"Remus?" followed by a knock caused the two to stop all movements, and Remus' hand to immedietly cover her mouth.

"Yes?" he asked, hoping to all that was holy, whoever it was, would not open the door.

"Molly made lunch, and we have a meeting soon," Sirius said from behind the door.

"I'll be down in a little bit," Remus called, as he shot Tonks a look, who was placing kisses to his hand, trying to move his hand.

"Okay, be quick, Dumbledore likes to start on time…" he trailed off, as Remus let down his hand as Tonks fell down to his chest in giggles.

"Sssh," Remus mumbled, his own smile twitching at his lips. Another knock, made him turn his head. "Yes Sirius?"

"Have you seen Tonks? She's not here yet, and uh, she's usually early," Sirius asked on the other side of the door. Remus looked at the woman who was now running her hands over his ribs in an attempt to tickle him, and pressing languish kisses on his neck. Why yes, he had seen her, in fact, he was seeing her right now.

"Yes, uh, she is in bed, slept here last night, I'll get her in a few moments," he lied as if on cue, Tonks muffled a laugh.

"Okay mate."

"You know what I'm going to do in a few minutes?" Tonks asked slyly as she quickly continued her tickling. "I'm going to make you see stars." Remus laughed as he gently took her hands into his.

"We should get dressed," he mumbled pressing a kiss on the top of her head.

"Okay," she grinned, pulling herself off him, feeling the tenderness between her legs, and the stickiness that came from both of them. Both dressed in silence, Remus in clean clothes, as Tonks slipped on her leggings, and grabbed one of his shirts, putting it on under her vest. Glancing at herself in the mirror on his wardrobe, she smiled. "I actually quite like this hair."

"I agree," Remus said as he buttoned his cardigan. "It is my favourite by far."

"Well, just because you said that, I'll keep it today," she winked and pulled two elastic bands from her pocket, drawing her hair into two pig tails.

Remus stood, staring at the door, knowing that beyond the large door, was a world that probably would be over the moon at knowing that they were together, but was he ready for that? Not at all… Sensing Remus' hesitation, she came up behind him, placing a hand on his upper arm. "They don't need to know. This isn't about them. It is about us. So this, whatever this is," she gestured, "is between us. To them, we're just friends."

"Thank you," Remus mouthed as he opened the door, and the two stepped into the world.

Tonks smiled, and walked out after him, her usual bounce in her step, which was almost more prominent than usual. They walked down the stairs, listening to the chatter, they stepped into the library, boots and cloaks still where they were left. Grabbing her boots, she slipped them on quickly tying her laces, as Remus merely waved at his, to made their way to their proper place in his wardrobe. He was quite comfortable in his slippers, and would be for the day. Together, they walked into the dining room, which was filled with people, all whom smiled and said hello.

Remus moved and sat down next to Sirius who was eating what seemed to be his second helping of Shepherd's Pie. He accepted the plate Molly handed him with a thank you, and brought the fork into his mouth. Sirius watched his friend leaning towards him. "You had sex last night."

Remus coughed on his nosh, and wide-eyed looked at his friend. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Uh huh," Sirius grinned wickedly. "You look relieved, have this look like you got some." Watching his friend's face change, Sirius laughed. "I'm just kidding. However, I heard the yelling…"

"Oh," Remus said softly his eyes travelling towards Tonks, who was having an animated conversation with Emmaline.

"You two all right?"

"Yes, we're fine," Remus stated, before turning back to Sirius. "We're just friends."

"That's good," Sirius smiled as the dining room door opened again, and the Hogwarts staff moved in. "If you need to talk."

"I know that you will be there to provide you oh so helpful comments," Remus smirked.

The meeting went by painfully slow, each sector giving reports, and updates on the situation. When it came to the tracking of the death eaters that escaped from Azkaban, Kingsley took over, explaining how he and Sirius had been working on a false trail, making it so he was responsible. Remus' attention strayed to Tonks, who was sitting across from him, she noticed him, brought her lip between her teeth and winked at him. He smiled as he felt her boot clad foot rest upon his stretched out slipper clad foot. There was something about that woman, that made Remus' heart skip a beat.

Two hours later, the members started trickling out of Grimmauld Place, each with new duties, and schedules for the next two weeks. Tonks walked out of the dining room, as Remus quickly excused himself, and followed the young woman. The hallway was empty, and she was standing there, leaning against the wall, her arms folded over her chest.

"Hi," she grinned.

"Hi," Remus smiled.

"So, I was thinking," she said inhaling. "We both have tonight off, I so maybe you'd like to have supper?"

"You cook?"

"Barely, but I make a really good spaghetti and meatballs," she teased. "We can do it at my flat."

"Sounds delightful," Remus smiled, because it was 11 more hours of this day, and he was determined to make their 'one day at a time' pact worth it. Tonks grinned brightly, and stood up on her tip toes, placing a soft kiss on his cheek, before she bounced out of the house. Sirius, who was standing in the doorway of the dining room smirked.

"A kiss huh?"

"It was nothing," Remus groaned turning to see his friend.

"Sure," Sirius started. "Listen Remus, you know, the teasing…"

"It's who you are, I know," Remus smiled softly, patting his friend on the shoulder. "Would you care to play a game of Chess?"

"I'm going to beat you," Sirius proclaimed. "I've been practicing!" Remus chuckled as the two walked into the library.

Remus spent the afternoon playing chess with Sirius, who for the first time in months, did not pester him about Tonks. Remus figured that Sirius had no real idea what occurred last night, but felt responsible. He always did have the urge to insert himself into everyone else's problems, but in true Sirius fashion when things got awkward, he got distracting. And so it was, Sirius had kept him occupied for hours, and it wasn't until the clock rang six that Remus started off towards Tonks home. Repeatedly stating to a curious Sirius that it was two friends having supper, nothing more.

He stood in front of her door, not knowing if he should knock, or enter at will. The last time he was there, there was no choice but to enter, it was an emergency. But now, now they were something else, not like he knew what, and it was new, and settled on one day at a time, with six hours remaining. he gently raised his fist to the door, and rapped it a few times. Shoving his hands in his pockets, Remus quickly turned around, he shouldn't be here, shouldn't be indulging in his feelings. There was a reason he was alone; he preferred to be alone…

"You're not leaving," a voice said from the doorway. Remus turned around and shook his head. She had changed, if it was one thing they shared, they both preferred to dress as Muggles, rather than the typical robes. His preference came from his mother, and her stating that a true gentlemen wore clean trousers, and a button up shirt. He assumed hers, came from her unique quality of doing what she wanted. So here she was, standing in her doorway looking at him. "Come in," she smiled softly. Remus walked past her outstretched arm. Her kitchen was an absolute disaster, and he chuckled by the dishes that littered the counter. She had a cauldron brewing something off to the side. "So I attempted to make something, but then, I got distracted, and so, toast and jam?" she pointed to the small table in front of her couch, that held a plate of toast, and a jar of jam, marmalade, and a jaw of peanut butter.

Remus smiled at the young woman, and allowed her to guide him to her couch. The one thing he didn't notice the last time he was in her flat, was the clutter of things from both worlds, much like his own. "My dad is Muggleborn," she explained jumping onto the couch, and bringing her sock clad feet to rest on the cushion. She smiled at him, not her usual wide- I'm so excited- smile, but a soft one, comforting.

"My mother," he smiled softly. "was a muggle."

"I didn't know that," Tonks smiled grabbing a piece of toast from the stack. "So, did you grow up that way?"

And that is how the evening went, nothing straying from how they were prior to her declaration a few months back. There were a few laughs, and a game of chess, which Remus let her win, just once, and her handing him one of her favourite books, stating that they could have a weekly "hang day" that didn't involve the moon. Remus chuckled and opened the book, and started to read.

"Although I am an old man, night is generally my time for walking…."


	11. Chapter 11

And as these heavens still by degrees arise,

Until they come to their first Mover's bound,

That in his mighty compass doth comprise,

And carry all the rest with him around;

So those likewise do by degrees redound,

And rise more fair; till they at last arrive

To the most fair, whereto they all do strive.

Remus was disgusted with himself, plain and simple. The one day at a time relationship he had started with Nymphadora although made every dream he ever had come true, he knew, deep down did he know it could not last. But the one days at a time had passed, and May was coming to an end. Did they see each other daily? Not at all, but when they did see each other, it was either in the confines of Grimmauld Place, where at any moment, there could be numerous members of the Order floating in, and the constant presence of Sirius, who was becoming increasingly bored with his surroundings, and took up to trailing Remus around, and begging to go with him, if he ever chose to leave the house, which was becoming more frequent.

"Good morning," a soft voice said, as Remus felt lips press between his shoulder blades. He smiled but didn't make a move to reciprocate, instead he continued on making his breakfast; eggs and toast.

"Good morning to you too," he replied, a smile twitching at the corner of his mouth. He felt her hands reach over his shoulders, and plant another kiss higher than before, before she pulled away. "What are you doing here so early?"

"Well," she started moving around and grabbing the toast that he had waiting on his plate, taking a bite, the crumbs falling liberally over her. "The full moon is coming."

"That I am quite aware of," Remus smirked, because he really did know, everything was heightened, and every moment he spent with her, smelling of lavender, grapefruit and vanilla cupcake, he wanted to ravish her more. But today, she had a new scent, something he wasn't expecting, the vanilla cupcake was gone, the lavender had only traces in her hair. She smelt even better, intoxicating even: now grapefruit mixed with peaches and cream, and raspberries. "Did you change your shampoo?"

"I did," Tonks smiled as she tugged on a bit of it, which had gone to shoulder length purple today. "How did you know?"

"You smell different," Remus shrugged as he placed his eggs on the plate that now laid a single piece of toast.

"Remus Lupin, do you pay attention to my smell?" she asked, a mischievous twinkle in her eyes, and a smile tugging at the corners of her own mouth. Not waiting for an answer, she clasped her hands around his neck, and rose to her tiptoes. "You know what I smell like…"

"I do," Remus smiled, his hands instinctively grasping her waist, his thumbs casually moving the fabric of her shirt from where the hem met her pants. "Lavender shampoo, grapefruit body wash, vanilla cupcake moisturizer," he recited. "You're different today," he closed his eyes. "Grapefruit is still the same, peaches and cream shampoo, and raspberries, you're now using raspberry lotion." A large smile spread over her face as he leaned down, paused just before his lips touched her.

"You like?" she whispered, waiting for his lips to reach hers. Remus didn't answer, but instead, his lips captured hers, and a small moan rose from her throat. All he wanted to do was slowly take her right there, in the kitchen. He could feel all thoughts leave his head, she had this effect on him, made him lose all ability to think logically.

"I knew it!" Sirius said loudly standing in the kitchen doorway. "You two! I knew it! You have been having sex!" Remus immediately pulled away, dropping his hands from her waist, and quickly shoving them into the pockets of his trousers, as Tonks' hair turned bright pink, and a blush rose up her cheeks. "Don't stop on my account."

"Sirius," Remus started, he felt like a child caught with his hand in the cookie jar.

"I knew there was a reason you two are alway more than happy to do scope outs together. Getting a shag on duty?"

"It's not like that Sirius," Tonks said as she shook her hair to its purple state. "Just…"

"Just you two sneaking off to shag?" Sirius asked, his eyebrows waggling.

"We do not shag," Remus groaned turning around, not facing his friend. He could feel embarrassment and anger rising up, and couldn't decide which was best to display. He could feel her heat beside him, could still smell her, and soon, when her hand touched his arm he turned back around.

"Sirius, this, Remus and I," she started, "we don't have, that is to say, we're not….we care about each other."

"Why yes you do," Sirius grinned wickedly.

"Be serious, Sirius," Remus groaned, he felt his arm be squeezed and he sighed.

"What we are, we're good friends, who…"

"Occasionally share a snog, or a shag, I understand," Sirius smirked. He was loving this entire thing, Remus and Tonks could tell.

"If you'll excuse me," Remus mumbled as he pulled his arm from Tonks' grasp, and walked past his friend. This was exactly a reason he knew that this whatever it was they were, was not a good idea. She made him not think clearly. Remus walked right upstairs, and into his bedroom. He was frustrated, he was anxious, generally unsettled.

"You're a right git you know," Tonks huffed as she glared at Sirius.

"What?"

"You claim to know Remus better than anyone, and you embarrass him like that? One interrupting a private moment, the other being a complete and utter arse when he was obviously flustered," Tonks was almost raging, she could feel her own annoyance on the brink. "For you information, not that we owe you anything, we don't know what we are, what we do know, is that we care about each other. Now excuse me Sirius, but I need to make sure he's going to be okay, we don't want him to cause a rage, the full moon is in two days after all." With that, Tonks strolled right past Sirius and left the kitchen. Sirius groaned and moved down and sank into a chair. This was just like school, his selfless friend having a problem with any form of happiness. Even when it was justly deserved.

Tonks took a deep breath as she walked up the stairs of the darkened hallway. She sometimes wondered if Sirius was stuck in the past, not realizing that his friend had changed, spent the same amount of years in isolation, thinking that his friends had betrayed them all. She knew how it was to spend a day with Dementors sucking every bit of happiness from her, she couldn't imagine twelve years…

Not bothering to knock, Tonks walked into Remus' bedroom. He looked calmer, was folding robes that he must have just washed.

"Hi," she mumbled with a smile, sitting on the bed.

"Dora," Remus acknowledged. "I'm sorry…"

"Don't apologize," Tonks said strongly. "Never apologize for someone else's actions. Never apologize for kissing me, okay?"

"I think today is not a day," Remus explained as he placed robes into the wardrobe.

"I disagree," Tonks retorted. "I think you were perfectly willing to let today be a day, you noticed I changed my shampoo, you didn't flinch when I touched you, you were perfectly content to just hold me, and kiss me," she smiled softly. "So, today will be a day, and tomorrow, we'll go again." Remus smiled at the young witch, who was still on his bed. "Say okay."

"Okay," he grinned, this woman had a hold on him, could make him do almost anything. At his confirmation, her smile spread across her face, and her eyes twinkled.

"Good, now," standing up she walked over to him, taking his hands in hers, and placed them on her hips. "I hoped I would get breakfast this morning, but what you had in mind was so much better."

"And what do you think I had in mind?" he had a bemused twinkle in his eyes, as her arms encircled his neck, placing with the small hairs at the nape of his neck.

"Oh, you know," she nudged his head down, and leaned upwards to capture his lips with her own.

"Mmm," Remus mumbled as he gently pulled away. "I was hoping to eat my eggs and toast."

"Oh me too," Tonks grinned wickedly, dropping her hands to his trouser button, fiddling with it. Remus laughed moving his hands to rest on her shoulders.

"Dora…"

"What?" she asked, as her hand started to carefully run over his member, still encased in layers of clothing.

"Do you really think this is appropriate?" he asked, his hand moving from her hip, to cover hers.

"I think that in two days, there is going to be a full moon, I think that tomorrow is another day, and I think if today will be the last day I get to be, whatever I am to you, then I am going to get myself a shag before work."

It was true, Remus did not know how to describe this relationship, was she his girlfriend? That seemed like an odd word for what they did, friends with benefits? That seemed more appropriate, but that seemed juvenile, and held no sense of affection. Because there was affection, a lot of it, he cared a great deal for this woman. So was it lovers? But then, that felt like they didn't have social time together, where sex wasn't involved, and if in all honesty, Remus enjoyed the time they spent together, and if it involved sex, then so be it, but he liked being social with her. She played dumb sometimes, but he knew she was smart, a lot smarter than people gave her credit for. Talented, it was a well balanced mixture of natural talent, but hard earned, because of what she was, who she was, everyone held doubt at what she could do.

"Remus," her voice was soft, and intoxicating, and drew him out his thoughts. Her hands had cupped his cheeks, slowly running her thumbs over his chin. "Are you all right?" Remus looked at the woman, her brows were furrowed in concern, her eyes had lost their mischievous sparkle, and were replaced with a look of utter concern. In that moment he felt the warmth rise up in him, and his smile twitching slowly at the corners of his lips. "Remus?"

"I'm good," he mumbled leaning down and placing a chaste kiss to her lips.

"Good," Tonks grinned against his lips. Not saying another word, she felt his hands slide around her waist, pulling her close. Deep down she knew that this was the moon, he was always the most affectionate , willing when his senses were heightened. She could feel him walking her back towards the bed, a rush of excitement surged through her body as the two fell to the bed, she pulled away from his lips, gasping. "Owe!"

"What? Are you okay?" Remus asked, as he watched her reach in between herself and the bed, pulling the wand out. "I'm so sorry, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," she grinned putting it beside her. "Moody was right, should not have put that in my back pocket." Remus looked at her serious face, and started laughing, his face falling to the crook of her neck.

"Seriously, you should close the door," Sirius groaned from the doorway. "If you two are going to be a secret item, I don't want to bare witness to it all."

"I'm not going to get laid am I?" Tonks asked, as she took hold of Remus' shirt, so that he wouldn't move away, she looked at Sirius who was leaning against the door frame, looking quite like a dog with its tail between his legs.

"No, I don't think you are," Remus confessed, with a chuckle. "Can we help you?"

"I'm happy for you two." Seeing his friend's relief, Sirius continued. "And I promise, I will not tease you or tell any body. Muarders Honour."

"Well, if I'm not going to get laid, do I at least get breakfast?" Tonks grinned as Remus sat up, letting her pull her body into a sitting position.

"Moony?" Sirius asked with a large grin. "Shall we."

"I think we shall," Remus smiled, knowing exactly what his friend was thinking. Standing up, he gave Tonks' shoulder a squeeze and leaving the room. Tonks sat on the bed, watching as Remus and Sirius left the room, talking in hushed voices. Shaking her head, she grabbed her wand, and slid it into her boot-Robbins would yell at her at work for that later, and she followed the two men.


	12. Chapter 12

Fair is the heaven where happy souls have place,

In full enjoyment of felicity,

Whence they do still behold the glorious face

Of the divine eternal Majesty;

More fair is that, where those Ideas on high

Enranged be, which Plato so admired,

And pure Intelligences from God inspired.

"Can't we just sleep?" Tonks whined, her head precariously placed on the stack of parchments laying on her desk.

"Its 8am," Robbins said looking at his partner.

"I don't like mornings," she groaned, her eyes fluttering shut, her hands clasping over the back of her head. Robbins looked at her, and his smile widened.

"You got laid last night!"

"What?" Tonks asked, lifting her head up, a bit, to avoid the men surrounding her seeing the blush that was rising over her cheeks.

"That's it! That is why you've been so tired, and late, and to sticking around after. You're getting laid! So, who's the bloke?" That caught the attention of the other men in the office, and they turned towards the young witch, who was now staring at partner. Usually quick on her feet, she remained stunned, her bottom lip sucked between her teeth.

There was something oddly perfect about Remus, the way he spoke her name, like velvet, Dora; or in any form of intimacy, Nymphadora. Usually she hated her name, but, with him, it was strangely comforting, and exciting. When his tongue spoke her name, she felt shivers. In fact, it seemed to her, that he would be the only person that she would allow her to call her by her given name.

"So Tonksie?" Robbins asked, a large grin on his face, "Who's the bloke?"

"Didn't we already have this conversation?" Tonks asked, her brows raising in question. "Like, a while back?"

"We have this conversation all the time," Savage smirked. "Robbins just wants to know if he has to beat this fellow up."

"And what if I said there was no fellow?" Tonks asked, sitting up straighter in her chair.

"We'd stalk you to find out what you're up to," Savage casually remarked.

"Nice love bite," Simon Shirley teased gesturing to the hickey on Tonks' neck. Her hand immediately went to cover it,

"Burnt myself..."

"With?" Horatio Hornslack asked, joining his peers.

"Curling iron," she explained explained.

"One, you hate washing your hair, let alone doing it," Robbins smirked. "And two, I seem to remember the last time you did your hair the normal way, it was for a bloke."

Tonks felt the blush starting to rise in her cheeks. She hated when the boys were right.

"And you never do your hair for us," Hornslack quipped.

"That's right!" Savage smirked. "Besides, your hair is straight. So, back to the giver of the hickey, what's his name?"

"Who are you, the Inquisitorial Squad?" Tonks asked, attempting to force the blush down from her cheeks. When had a man ever feel like this?

"Oh hold your tongue miss, I hold no association with Umbridge!" Savage declared, which followed several agreements, from those not actively involved in the prosecution of her mystery relationship.

"You all suck you know," Tonks groaned. "I'm going to the loo."

"We'll send Matilda in after you!" Robbins called as Tonks walked briskly towards the loo. She needed to escape the constant questioning, which had been going on for months. At first she played along, because it was fun. But now, almost everyday she was questioned about why she was so tired, why she couldn't go out with the boys anymore, why she was always busy. Kingsley and Moody had told her if she mentioned the order at work, they would do unspeakable things. She wasn't afraid, but work seemed more and more unsteady. All the Aurors were basically put on desk duty, she and Robbins had been assigned to finding the whereabouts of Ipswich, who was one of the ten who escaped from Azkaban. Which had become the mission of the entire office, minus Dale Hill, Peter White, James Rudolph, and Edmund Carroll, who were taking shifts at Azkaban. She was grateful that Kingsley insisted he needed her away, because of her relation to Sirius and the LeStranges. She knew it was because of the order.

Leaning her head against the mirror, Tonks felt it cool her. She shouldn't be this work up, they weren't even technically dating. But she knew how she felt, how he made her feel: perfect.

"Tonks dear," Matilda Astaire smiled from the doorway.

"They sent you?" Tonks asked with a large sigh, turning to look at the older woman.

"Our illustrious leader," Matilda rolled her eyes. "Meeting with Fudge and Thicknesse. Want to know if we caught anyone yet."

"Yes because they've made it so easy," Tonks groaned, turning the tap on, an splashing water on her face.

"Do you love him?" Matilda asked, waving her wand a the door.

"What?"

"The gentleman you've been seeing, do you love him?"

Tonks stared at Matilda, and blinked. That was the first time someone but herself asked her that question. Did she love Remus? "I don't know."

"Can I give you some advice?" She asked, and with Tonks' nod, she spoke again. "We all see it, some of us are more discrete than Savage, Hornslack, and Robbins. You're happy, always smiling, and your hair has been going between bright colours, and that, which dare to assume is his favourite?" Tonks looked in the mirror, her hair was the caramel brown he liked, which hit just below her shoulders. "I thought so. You're young, don't let that stop you. John and I got married around your age. Make sure he knows you love him, okay?"

"Okay," Tonks smiled softly.

"Also, we may need to get you some concealer," Matilda said walking up and inspecting the small bruise on her neck, that in truth, was caused last night by a very assertive Remus. She was sure there were more, covered by clothes, along with scratches on her back, and bruises on her thighs from his fingers.

"One thing I haven't been able to alter," Tonks scrunched up her face in frustration. "Bruises always show."

Matilda chuckled and reached into her robes, pulling out her small bottle of concealer. "What's he like?"

Tonks stopped, and took in a breath. Remus...he was...Remus...A werewolf, a self-loathing man, who was strangely passionate about knowledge, and her..."Quiet, he likes to read, and play chess. He's witty though, always has a comeback," she smiled as Matilda was dabbing the liquid onto her neck. "He's passionate about almost everything. And smart. He's…."

"Sounds like you met your match," Matilda grinned as she finished dabbing. "There. You can have mine, I have more at home. Just cover up these prior to work, and those boys should leave you alone."

"Sounds fabulous," Tonks beamed. "Thank you Matilda."

"We girls have to stick together," Matilda winked. "Come on, before Scrimgeour has kittens."

Tonks laughed and the two women left the bathroom, and approached Scrimgeour who looked as if he hadn't taken a breath since Matilda came in. "What? I'm here aren't I? You worry too much Rufus. I'm the best you got." Winking, she walked past him, and straight into the door frame, causing a loud Oomphf to escape her lips. "I'm good!" She could feel Matilda's amused eyes on her, and Scrimgeour's annoyed gaze.

The meeting lasted hours, and Tonks was getting more bored than she would be listening to Snape talk about the Malfoy boy. She was leaning back in her chair, staring out the window of the meeting room. Her wand twirling between her fingers. Nothing new was being said, no one was closer to finding the escaped prisoners. Kingsley had given a fantastic false lead about Sirius- who at this moment was probably laying in the backyard of Grimmauld Place, basking in the sun, as Remus tended the garden. Remus again.

"Tonks and Robbins?"

"What?" Tonks asked, breaking her thoughts. "Oh uh, yeah, vanished like thin air. Vaults haven't been touched, Ollivander swears he didn't sell any wands to them. So uh... Vanished into thin air. Like magic." She could tell immediately that Fudge and Thicknesse were not impressed, both had their eyes narrowed in her direction.

"Look, what we do know is that someone was visiting them. Plain and simple right? No not at all. This person orchestrated the breakout, provided those inside with their wands back. Which were stored here at the ministry. Which begs the question, who was guarding the wand room at that time? The answer, is not that simple, because you see, the wizard from your department Pius, who was on duty, was confunded, or under the imperious curse. Either way, their wands disappeared at different times, over what we can determine months. If you look at the records, it was one wand here and another there. And your department didn't bother to tell us, that wizards wands, being the most high security in Azkaban went missing. Of course, when Sirius Black's went missing almost two years ago, who actually knew? The wand that killed 50 muggles mysteriously vanished after his escape. So yes, we know a few things, but do we know enough to find them? Not in the slightest. I've kept tail on the Malfoys and other known death eaters who apparently have come back to our side, and what I've noted, is that one, you can't apparate onto the Malfoy's ground. Weird right? I thought so too. So Sebastian here and I did some fancy Auror things and we scoped out the house for what? 2 weeks. We needed to get in, so we tipped off Arthur Weasley, and I did some crazy appearance changing things, and Seb stayed behind. He watched my Foe glass, and you know what? Nothing, no trace that our man was in the Malfoy manor. Remember I can see through invisibility cloaks, and really, what Auror can't detect a disillusionment charm? Now the one thing about being trained by Moody, he lends me things. So Malfoy Manor was a bust. Seb and I have been working on another known partner of theirs, and continue to look. I know this seems like we've done nothing, but Cornelius, Pius, I would love to know if you could do our job. Because I seem to remember, best of the best, so if you can't do it, I suggest that you let us go, so we can do our jobs."

The moment she stopped talking, Tonks realised 24 sets of eyes on her, most of pride, shock, amusement, but the two she was staring down were of annoyance.

"Tonks is it?" Fudge asked, as she nodded. "How old are you."

"I don't think that matters Cornelius, what I do think matters, is how we are sitting in this room, and have been for hours, when we could be out, doing our jobs. I'm sure Amelia Bones would agree. You still answer to her, don't you Pius?" Tonks felt she had crossed the line, but at this point there was no going back.

"I'd tone it down Tonks," Robbins mumbled from beside her.

"I think we're done here," Tonks declared standing up. "Rufus, I'll see you in your office for my write up? I want to get Moody here first though." With that, she winked and walked straight out of the room. She had always been gutsy, but where did that come from? Shaking her head, she walked back towards her desk, grabbing a quill and a piece of parchment scribbing down a note to Moody. _Ran my mouth again. Basically told Thickenesse, Fudge, and Scrimgeour off. You better come._ Putting it into her a small pot that was sitting in the back most corner of her desk, it burned purple for a moment, before it popped out again. Grabbing it, she smiled at the response. _On way. Prat._

"He's pissed," Robbins said as the rest of the Aurors entered their office.

"Tonks, I..." Kingsley sighed, shaking his head. He opened his mouth to say something, but the young witch just smiled widely and awkwardly at him.

"Moody is coming, it's not like they'll do anything to me," Tonks smiled as she plopped into her chair. "Really, as long as Moody still has whatever he has on Scrimgeour…"

"Tonks, in my office," a loud voice said, as Tonks turned around seeing Scrimgeour walk right past his staff.

"Moody is coming," she called after, as the door slammed.

"You are in for it," Robbins said taking in a breath, staring at the woman.

"Nymphadora, his office," a gruff voice interrupted everyone, as Moody's staff and iron leg slammed on the ground. "Now."

"I'm coming," Tonks whined as she stood up, and followed Moody in.

"That girl," Robbins said once the door was closed. "Took one for all of us."

Walking into Grimmauld Place, Tonks felt the weight of the day finally hit her. The house was quiet, she could hear the crackling of the fireplace in the sitting room, hoping that Remus was up. It wasn't like it was late, but usually at night before the full moon he would sleep early. Kicking her boots off, she decided that even Sirius would do, she walked into the sitting room, and smiled softly. There he was, sitting on his favourite couch, fire blazing, Sirius curled up in front of the fireplace asleep (he was in his dog form, which Tonks could only assume Remus took him for a walk after hours of pestering.), and her eyes travelled back to him, reading. Padding across the room, she knew he felt her presence, as he opened an arm, not looking up from his book. Tonks smiled softly, and moved almost quickly, sliding onto his lap, wrapping her arms around his torso, and burying her head in the crook of his neck. Remus said nothing, but wrapped an arm around her, her legs over his lap, and arms wrapped around his torso.

"He started for the companion stairs but turned his head for a final word. 'Do you know the only value life has is what life puts upon itself? And it is of course overestimated, since it is of necessity prejudiced in its own favor. Take that man I had aloft. He held on as if he were a precious thing, a treasure beyond diamonds or rubies. To you? No. To me? Not at all. To himself? Yes. But I do not accept his estimate. He sadly overrates himself. There is plenty more life demanding to be born. Had he fallen and dripped his brains upon the deck like honey from the comb, there would have been no loss to the world. he was worth nothing to the world…" Remus paused, as Tonks shifted her head, and reached to turn the page. And it went on like that, Remus reading the novel, her hand flipping the pages.

This was one of her favourite things...


	13. Chapter 13

Yet fairer is that heaven, in which do reign

The sovereign Powers and mighty Potentates,

Which in their high protections do contain

All mortal princes and imperial states;

And fairer yet, whereas the royal Seats

And heavenly Dominations are set,

From whom all earthly governance is fet.

They rarely had sex when they were together; it wasn't like it it was bad, on the contrary, Remus was quite satisfied by the entire encounter. Although he didn't have a lot of experience to compare it to; one less than satisfying encounter with his one ex-girlfriend. Sirius, James, and Peter had orchestrated the entire ordeal. It wasn't like he didn't care about Dora, because he cared a lot, more than he could describe. But that was just it, he cared too much for her to be bogged down with him, a dangerous creature, a poor man, an old man, a man that couldn't give her what she so desperately deserved. He was no coward, but he was cautious, and concerned. And the three weeks of bliss was now over, as so he decided, she deserved someone who was healthy, young, and whole. She meant everything to him, and he couldn't hurt her...

Crawling out of the bed, the moonlight shining through his bedroom window, her hair sprawled on the pillow, her face peaceful, and her chest rising and falling with each breath. He couldn't be the one to take all that away, he couldn't... She had an air of innocence about her, more so evident as she slept, still like a child. He knew she wasn't a child, knew that she was a woman, a woman who was more in control of herself than he could be, she loved intensely, he knew it, he could feel it.

Moving quickly to the wardrobe, he dressed in silence, waving his wand to pack his belongings, silently. He needed to leave, leave the place where things came to volition, which meant, leaving his best friend... Packed with the basics, Remus leaned down, placing a kiss on her forehead, before he left the room.

She had opted to stay last night, it was becoming increasingly common, and she would start out in her bed, but declaring that his blanket was warmer, and they would just sleep. She always took up more of the bed than her size, somehow moving to the centre of the bed, hair scattered across the pillow she drug with her, legs sticking out of the covers, only using enough to cover her torso. Himself, loved being warm and wrapped up while sleeping, and somehow it seemed to mesh.

It seemed they were the opposite on most things, and for some reason, it all worked. But, Remus couldn't do it, he couldn't be the one to saddle her with the life of absolute nothing. If he survived this war, he had nothing to offer her, and he wasn't really willing for her to figure that out and leave him.

"You're not going," a voice behind him said softly, Remus turned and saw her standing at the bottom of the stairs.

"I can't do this," Remus said, a quiver in his voice. "You deserve so much more."

"I deserve what I want," Tonks mumbled.

"I am old, I am poor, and I am too dangerous."

"No you're not, why can't you see that?" She begged, her eyes almost pleading for him to stay.

"How many times do I have to say I'm not good for you?"

"You can say it over and over again, and that won't make it true!" She shot back. "You love me, that's all that matters!"

"Nymphadora, I don't love you, I never have, and never will," it was a lie, he knew it. But as soon as it left his mouth, he felt something, in him, in her, start to crumble. "Goodbye." He turned around, waving at his wand, not wanting to see her face. He opened the door, and disappeared into the night.

Tonks stood there, clad in her pyjamas, her chest felt tight, her stomach fell, and she could feel tears welling up in her eyes. Her shoulders started to shudder when she felt a pair of warm hands touch her arms, turning her around, and wrapping their arms around her. Nymphadora Tonks didn't cry, even in the dead of night when the only man she loved walked out.

"Mad-Eye is on his way," the voice mumbled, a hand gently rubbing her back. "He'll come around."

"No," Tonks replied resting her head in the crook of Sirius' neck. She could feel the tears on the verge of falling, but she didn't cry, not even when her heart felt like it was breaking.

The two stood in silence, her tears slowly falling from gravity, as she fought to keep composure. But when the familiar sound of an iron leg hitting the hardwood, she felt Sirius' arms let go of her, and her body moved into Moody's, the tears starting to fall, her shoulders shuddering, as she struggled for breath. Because Nymphadora Tonks only cried when she knew she was safe. She could hear Moody and Sirius talking softly, his grip around her never once wavered. Because no matter how tough, rouge, never taking anyone's shit, she knew that Alastor Moody loved her like a daughter.

"That is quite enough now Nymphadora," the gritty voice ordered, letting her body pull away from his. Her hand went to wipe the stray tears from her cheeks.

"I wasn't crying," she joked weakly.

"Raining on your face," Moody replied, his eye twinkling. Tonks smiled weakly, and wiped the remaining tears from her eyes.

His words still stung, and clutched to her like there was nothing in the world she could do to fix it.

"I should go," she mumbled softly, adjusting the straps of her tank top, looking at the two men. Sirius with such compassion written on his face, a hint of anger in his eyes, Moody, a soften expression.

"You don't have to," Sirius softly spoke, as she shook her head.

"I need to," Tonks confirmed, knowing that if she stayed in Grimmauld Place, he would never return to his senses.

"It's the middle of the night," Sirius protested as Moody shot him a look. "At least let Moody take you home."

"I'm going to go to my parents," Tonks replied, looking at Moody who nodded gruffly. Tonks nodded and moved upstairs to collect her wand, and cloak.

"He said he didn't love her," Sirius explained, as Moody nodded. "My best friend is a stupid git."

"Blinded by his condition," Moody explained. "I'll talk to him."

"You'll do no such thing," Tonks stated from the top of the stairs, cloak now covering her pyjamas. "Leave him...please?" Her voice was pleading, and both knew that at least tonight they would abide by her wishes.

Remus walked into the night air, he could feel it prickling his skin, but in this moment, he dropped his head and apparated He knew there was no going back, there was no forgiving what he said, he would never forgive himself, because he knew inside the house he just left, there was the woman he loved, crying, and alone. He knew Nymphadora, knew that no matter how strong she pretended to be, she was still a person with feelings, such passionate feelings, that he knew she would only cry when she felt protected. Stepping into his cottage, Remus felt his breath finally escape. Had he been holding it the entire time? Waving his hand, the lights turned on, and he thanked his mother for always making sure that electricity was in every house they had ever lived. Little luxuries that he wished the majority of wizards would implicate into their homes. The house was just as he left it, and he moved quickly into the kitchen, his suitcase continued its way to the bedroom, as he moved into the kitchen.

He leaned his head against the wall, Remus felt his heart rate slow down, and the entire situation that transpired. "You're an idiot Remus Lupin," he mumbled to himself, as he pulled himself away from the wall and moved around the room. It was true, he was an idiot, an idiot who this time, finally blew any chance he had at being happy. Groaning, to himself, Remus slammed his fist against the wall, feeling the pain radiate up his arm.

There were a few things that Remus knew for sure, one being that it may not happen tonight, but he knew, for sure, that Dora would be knocking on his door, forcing herself into his home, because Nymphadora Tonks was not a subtle woman, and generally would not take no for an answer. But he knew that he had hurt her, and knew that it was not going to be easily fixed. Entering his bedroom, Remus flopped down on his bed, and stared at the ceiling, the white he hated so much surrounded him, as he fell into a state of sleep.


End file.
